15 February 2004 (Sunday)
i really hope to put some decent demos up tomorrow, including the challenge song. i started 2 very different shine songs...
valentines day was also winter folk fest day here in fairbanks, and i played this new thing which i just wrote last night... it went very well... if i had a copy of today's performance, i'd post that as my demo, but for some reason they didn't broadcast or record the show (they have in the past).
this is all john darnielle. except i was hitting crazy high notes today, some in tune.
scurvy song
i am dreaming of orchards
and landlocked fields of cherries and limes
i rise and fall with the ocean
and dream of happier times
i left the hills of guadalajara
strong and sure and eager to learn
i shipped out of san sebastien
not knowing that i would never return
i recall seņoritas
who will cry when they hear of me
i can't quite remember
why i went to sea
i thought i would never be humbled
now i see how meager i am
i am starting to weaken
after five weeks of biscuits and jam
i am dreaming of orchards
where my home used to be
i remember a beauty
my eyes will ne'er again see
i am dreaming of orchards
as my bones atrophy
i am on the long voyage homeward
to my final home in the sea
Comments: 3
those are some pretty brave vocal beltings there at the end... and you mostly hit them. ;) i like this song, and the general idea of it... narrative songs are awesome!
but the music gets gets a bit monotonous for my tastes. i might suggest that you re-tool the melody for the "seņoritas..." and second "dreaming of orchards..." stanzas into more of a chorus. that would transion well into the harmonica solo as well. perhaps you could end on the harmonica too?
burr [12:40AM CST 17-Feb-2004]
hey, burr, who are you? i haven't had much of a chance to tour your website or read your novel to find out. but your suggestions are great, and your musical and technical skills are jealousworthy.
as a dylan fan, i have a love-hate relationship with monotony. but i think a lot of my songs would benefit greatly from more interesting arrangements. i'll have to wait till march for that, though.
willis [01:46AM CST 17-Feb-2004]
I like how this sounds like it's coming of an AM radio. Good melody, very Darnielle, you weren't kidding. I think Burr's suggestions have valid weight in this song's case...even just a minor change might throw the listener out of a head bob which would be nice...it would be fun to record this song with 5 deep voiced guys doing background vocals.
hopper [01:59PM CST 18-Feb-2004]