Laaaaaadiiiiiiess and Gennnnnntlemen! Wellllllcommmme to the Big Top! Before you, in the CENTER RING, we have a CLOWN! And not just any clown! This clown is going to perform a feat of DEATH-DEFYING AGILITY! In a few moments, he will be flung from a catapult of UNPARALELLED POWER up INTO THE AIR, there to fly through three FLAMING LOOPS of FIRE before plunging into the bucket of water. But come on now, we have no time, because we must pass on to the SECOND RING. In the SECOND RING, we have Kazar, the most savage LION in the WORLD. Brought here at great expense from the WILDS of AFRICA, Kazar was named MAN-KILLER by the natives after no less than FORTY natives lost their LIVES attempting to subdue this MONSTER. In just a handful of seconds, we will release SEVEN VICIOUS FIGHTING DOGS into the ARENA with the lion. These dogs have been trained from BIRTH for battle, and have not eaten for TWO FULL DAYS. They are starving and ready for BLOOD! Only one of the eight will SURVIVE to FIGHT AGAIN. Who will it be, ladies and gentlemen? Ponder that as we move on to the FINAL RING!
Watch this carefully, friends. Quiet now, for this is a MOST SPECIAL OPPORTUNITY. Observe the