My Room - Criticism

So here you are. Where's that, eh? Well, as I have often been accused of being an overly critical individual, I have decided to begin applying this harsh anylitical style of mine to the forms of artistic endeavor - music and words - around which this site is constructed. The thoughts I offer (as far as I can tell and is possible) are mine alone - I have no aspirations of writing for Rolling Stone, et al. Please take this into account when reading the reviews presented below. Also kindly note that several (if not most) of what is here collected was first published in The Daily Cardinal. Thus, certain musings are far more formal than others.

I hope this collection of subjective drivel (for, can it be anything but?) aids you in some appreciable way when deciding what it is to which you would like to subject your eyes and ears. I have included a series of several-year-old musings with which I no longer agree but still feel are legitimate pieces of criticism given the context in which they were drafted. I (don't) apologize.

Featured Tunes!
The Boxhead Ensemble - Last Place to Go; 20 October 1998
The Lost Sounds - Memphis is Dead; ??? 2000
Spacemen 3 - Perfect Prescription; ??? 1987

Live Tunes!
Savage Aural Hotbed - The University of Wisconsin Memorial Union Terrace, Madison, WI, USA; 19 September 1998
Less Than Jake - The Barrymore Theatre, Madison, WI, USA; 5 November 1998
Son Volt - The Barrymore Theatre, Madison, WI, USA; 9 September 1999
Wilco - The Barrymore Theatre, Madison, WI, USA; 16 November 2000
The Residents - The Orpheum Theatre, Madison, WI USA; 22 February 2001
Kent Kessler, Fred Lonberg-Holm, Michael Zerang - The University of Wisconsin Memorial Union Terrace, Madison, WI, USA, 28 April 2001

Other Tunes!
Talking Heads - Sand in the Vaseline; 13 October 1992
Skinnerbox - What You Can Do, What You Can't; 8 April 1997
Bad Manners - Heavy Petting; 4 November 1997
All - Mass Nerder; 5 May 1998
Pinehurst Kids - Minnesota Hotel; 7 July 1998
The Slackers - The Question; 20 October 1998
Chamberlain - The Moon My Saddle; 10 November 1998
David Hillyard and the Rocksteady Seven - Playtime; 9 March 1999
Looper - Up a Tree; 9 March 1999
Jacob Fred Jazz Odyssey - Welcome Home; 8 June 1999
American Football - American Football; 14 September 1999
Kelly Hogan & the Pine Valley Cosmonauts - Beneath the Country Underdog; 1 January 2000
Sunnysmack - A Soundtrack for Sara; 14 March 2000
Matt Suggs - Golden Days Before They End; 6 June 2000
Devil in a Woodpile - Division Street; 18 July 2000
Great Plains - Length of Growth 1981-1989; 3 August 2000
Jets to Brazil - Four Cornered Night; 15 August 2000
The Wisdom of Harry - House of Binary; 29 August 2000
Gomez - Abandoned Shopping Trolley Hotline; 10 October 2000
Jega - Geometry; 17 October 2000
Red Snapper - Our Aim is to Satisfy Red Snapper; 17 October 2000
Superdrag - In the Valley of Dying Stars; 17 October 2000
J Mascis + the Fog - More Light; 24 October 2000
Rainer Maria - A Better Version of Me; 23 January 2001
Garageland - Do What You Want; 17 April 2001

Words!
Joe Sacco - Safe Area Gorazde; June 2000
Dungeon Master's Guide (3rd Ed.); September 2000
Johnny Ryan - Angry Youth Comix #1; ??? 2000
Lonely Planet Europe on a Shoestring (2nd Ed.); February 2001

Top 5 Albums to Grow a Beard by (as of 21 March 2001, 20:57 CST):
(disclaimer: my notion of beard growing is informed by the intrinsically schoraly gesture that I read in such activity. As such, I reject any list that centers on the popular notion that associates the beard with so-called "jam bands" and their less than intellectual approach to the practice.)
1) Built to Spill - There's Nothing Wrong with Love
These kids from Idaho taught us 2 very important lessons: life is too short to dwell on that which makes us miserable and that the act of somehow curtailing our wild affection for all things wonderful is a truly grevious mistake. Cutting oneslf while shaving is unpleasant and the beard is a fantastically effective metaphor for the overflowing cup of love that we all doubtlessly hold.
2) Mogwai - Young Team
This disc is muscular yet quiet. He who grows while partaking in Glasgow's finest will not be the proud cultivator of the exuberant facial hair that will come to the Built to Spill follower. Oh no. Instead, the listener will find themselves with an understated yet powerful jaw of sleek hair. Recommended for those with naturally dark and thick facial hair.
3) Son Volt - Trace
After easing Trace into ones compact disc player, it quickly becomes evident that these are tunes for contemplation. While driving along a never-ending American highway in June with the windows wide and the sun setting over the Mississippi, the only natural inclination is to allow one's beard to grow without restriction. After all, there really is nothing like the feeling of the country wind moving the folicles as it will. Truly a "Windfall".
4) Fugazi - In on the Killtaker
Strong and smart - that effectively sums up Fugazi's performance on this brilliant recording. Operating in the vein of the leftist collegiate contigent, these gentlemen offer the world a collection of tunes that are as much for the mind as for the body. The beard symbolizes the interplay between the mind and the body - hair (of physical substance) will only grow when "watered" with enlightened thought (which manifests itself via the mouth - the province of the beard).
5) Captain Beefheart - Trout Mask Replica
Don van Vliet is a clever fellow. So much so that his listening audience has been consistently puzzled by his aims ever since the release of this dazzling work in 1969. As is necessary with any great work of art, Trout Mask Replica requires of its listener an immense (some would say never-ending) amount of time before any insight can be had. Now, as you will most likely be scratching your head and stroking your chin in a prolific manner throughout your excursion into van Vliet's world, your beard will have a sheen attained by few (as the constant friction generated will remove any particles which have decided to stow away). This continued contact will also most likely result in facial hair of an extraordinarily thick nature - perhaps the inspiration for the recent spat of accusations involving alleged facial application of Rogaine among Beefheartians.

inanely unimportant queries? gettler@cs.wisc.edu