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Channel: Loveawake.com blog

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      ["title"]=>
      string(33) "What Do You Do With A Bad Kisser?"
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Let?s set the stage?you?re excited. You waited to kiss her until the 3rd date since you really really like her and wanted to build a little anticipation. After a great night of flirting, little touches, laughter and lingering glances into a very interested second party?s pretty blue eyes, you quite simply can not WAIT to […]

The post What Do You Do With A Bad Kisser? appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

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Let?s set the stage?you?re excited. You waited to kiss her until the 3rd date since you really really like her and wanted to build a little anticipation. After a great night of flirting, little touches, laughter and lingering glances into a very interested second party?s pretty blue eyes, you quite simply can not WAIT to get to the evening?s finale. The big moment comes at the front door when she tilts her face up to yours and you just know she wants to kiss you as much as you want to kiss her. You lean in for the kiss and? find yourself ravaged by a tonsil hockey veteran and excess slobber all over the lower half of your face.

I don?t think I?m the only one to say? EWWWWWWWWW! What to do with a bad kisser?

What do you do when you get hit with a kisser who never learned finesse or whose idea of a ?good kiss? is drastically different than yours? (I mean, I?m sure there are people thinking slobber is sexy. Its also possible that they own Hootch-like slobber hounds who have developed their tolerance for excess goo, but that?s only a theory?) If your date was marginal at best, that bad kiss is likely to end the relationship. But what happens when you REALLY really like this person? Do you take a hit for the team and stay in the game, or walk away to play another day?

I?m a bad kisser survivor and managed to turn it around. I had tact. I had knowledge. And I had plenty of motivation. So, I offered to give him lessons one night. Yes, he was that bad. One very interesting evening later and we had noticeable progress. Our relationship didn?t last very long, partly because of compatibility and partly because he was dating someone else without telling either of us. But I did manage to teach him how to kiss and his other girlfriend thanked me for it after we both caught him in his lies and kicked him to the curb. She and I are still friends. A story for another day. But I wouldn?t advise many to take the path I did because if I?d paid more attention to how he kissed, I may have intuited a lot more about how he treated women. Instead, I taught him how to mask those red flags and become a more wily womanizer. *sigh* You live and learn.

But I digress from the bad kisser dilemma? What to do?

As far as I can tell, there are 4 death kiss situations:

Different Technique Kisser

This kisser just doesn?t know how to tickle your toes. They are either too much or too little on the scale of what revs your motor. Verdict: SALVAGEABLE. If you communicate, you may be able to get around this particular problem if interested enough in the potential relationship. I?d say to go gentle and ease into any conversation around it. Show and Tell is perfect. Start with positives about what you really like and then give an example. Many times, the longer a couple is together, the more their likes and dislikes begin to mesh. So a little patience goes a long way here.

Bad Technique Kisser

Too much slobber, tight little bird pecks, tonsil hockey and the like. Verdict: PROCEED WITH CAUTION. Like my example, you can teach but I?d recommend really looking at what you think is so bad. Is he really selfish? Is she kind of cold? Doesn?t respond at all to your body language? Don?t ignore these kinds of signs. Some people are just clueless and don?t know what they?re doing. That?s workable. But if you think the kiss is bad for other reasons? think again before continuing. Kisses can be very revealing about character.

Bad Breath Kisser

Verdict: USUALLY AN EASY FIX? two words ?Tooth? and ?Brush.? Try for a second ?first kiss? in fresher conditions. However, if you have (or are) a halitosis Hal? sometimes a doctor or diet change can help, but if not? it may end up being a deal breaker for the finicky.

No Chemistry Kisser

It can really really suck (no pun intended) to absolutely love being around someone who you can talk to for hours without pause, go in for a kiss and feel like you?re kissing your sibling. I don?t know what to say about this one. Some people tell me that they developed chemistry over time. I never have. That doesn?t mean its not possible, just that if its not there for that kiss? it tends to never show up (for me.) Have you ever kissed someone, felt nothing or even was turned off and managed to turn it into something romantic anyway?

I don?t know what to think about the couples who decide to not kiss until the wedding day. I mean, talk about potential for disaster adding all that pressure to something that is usually sweet, simple and private between two people. Part of me admires the self-discipline and part of me just thinks they are nutso-bonko (to borrow a phrase from one of my favorite people) to take that kind of gamble. I know that they?re building on something important by developing the emotional, intellectual, spiritual and psychological first? but completely missing the physical? Hummmm?

Quite literally, it can really suck to date a bad kisser but it would be much worse to be married to one.

The post What Do You Do With A Bad Kisser? appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" } ["summary"]=> string(587) "

Let?s set the stage?you?re excited. You waited to kiss her until the 3rd date since you really really like her and wanted to build a little anticipation. After a great night of flirting, little touches, laughter and lingering glances into a very interested second party?s pretty blue eyes, you quite simply can not WAIT to […]

The post What Do You Do With A Bad Kisser? appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["atom_content"]=> string(5727) "

Let?s set the stage?you?re excited. You waited to kiss her until the 3rd date since you really really like her and wanted to build a little anticipation. After a great night of flirting, little touches, laughter and lingering glances into a very interested second party?s pretty blue eyes, you quite simply can not WAIT to get to the evening?s finale. The big moment comes at the front door when she tilts her face up to yours and you just know she wants to kiss you as much as you want to kiss her. You lean in for the kiss and? find yourself ravaged by a tonsil hockey veteran and excess slobber all over the lower half of your face.

I don?t think I?m the only one to say? EWWWWWWWWW! What to do with a bad kisser?

What do you do when you get hit with a kisser who never learned finesse or whose idea of a ?good kiss? is drastically different than yours? (I mean, I?m sure there are people thinking slobber is sexy. Its also possible that they own Hootch-like slobber hounds who have developed their tolerance for excess goo, but that?s only a theory?) If your date was marginal at best, that bad kiss is likely to end the relationship. But what happens when you REALLY really like this person? Do you take a hit for the team and stay in the game, or walk away to play another day?

I?m a bad kisser survivor and managed to turn it around. I had tact. I had knowledge. And I had plenty of motivation. So, I offered to give him lessons one night. Yes, he was that bad. One very interesting evening later and we had noticeable progress. Our relationship didn?t last very long, partly because of compatibility and partly because he was dating someone else without telling either of us. But I did manage to teach him how to kiss and his other girlfriend thanked me for it after we both caught him in his lies and kicked him to the curb. She and I are still friends. A story for another day. But I wouldn?t advise many to take the path I did because if I?d paid more attention to how he kissed, I may have intuited a lot more about how he treated women. Instead, I taught him how to mask those red flags and become a more wily womanizer. *sigh* You live and learn.

But I digress from the bad kisser dilemma? What to do?

As far as I can tell, there are 4 death kiss situations:

Different Technique Kisser

This kisser just doesn?t know how to tickle your toes. They are either too much or too little on the scale of what revs your motor. Verdict: SALVAGEABLE. If you communicate, you may be able to get around this particular problem if interested enough in the potential relationship. I?d say to go gentle and ease into any conversation around it. Show and Tell is perfect. Start with positives about what you really like and then give an example. Many times, the longer a couple is together, the more their likes and dislikes begin to mesh. So a little patience goes a long way here.

Bad Technique Kisser

Too much slobber, tight little bird pecks, tonsil hockey and the like. Verdict: PROCEED WITH CAUTION. Like my example, you can teach but I?d recommend really looking at what you think is so bad. Is he really selfish? Is she kind of cold? Doesn?t respond at all to your body language? Don?t ignore these kinds of signs. Some people are just clueless and don?t know what they?re doing. That?s workable. But if you think the kiss is bad for other reasons? think again before continuing. Kisses can be very revealing about character.

Bad Breath Kisser

Verdict: USUALLY AN EASY FIX? two words ?Tooth? and ?Brush.? Try for a second ?first kiss? in fresher conditions. However, if you have (or are) a halitosis Hal? sometimes a doctor or diet change can help, but if not? it may end up being a deal breaker for the finicky.

No Chemistry Kisser

It can really really suck (no pun intended) to absolutely love being around someone who you can talk to for hours without pause, go in for a kiss and feel like you?re kissing your sibling. I don?t know what to say about this one. Some people tell me that they developed chemistry over time. I never have. That doesn?t mean its not possible, just that if its not there for that kiss? it tends to never show up (for me.) Have you ever kissed someone, felt nothing or even was turned off and managed to turn it into something romantic anyway?

I don?t know what to think about the couples who decide to not kiss until the wedding day. I mean, talk about potential for disaster adding all that pressure to something that is usually sweet, simple and private between two people. Part of me admires the self-discipline and part of me just thinks they are nutso-bonko (to borrow a phrase from one of my favorite people) to take that kind of gamble. I know that they?re building on something important by developing the emotional, intellectual, spiritual and psychological first? but completely missing the physical? Hummmm?

Quite literally, it can really suck to date a bad kisser but it would be much worse to be married to one.

The post What Do You Do With A Bad Kisser? appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["date_timestamp"]=> int(1568379120) } [1]=> array(11) { ["title"]=> string(37) "What to Do When the Ex Wants You Back" ["link"]=> string(76) "https://blog.loveawake.com/2019/09/13/what-to-do-when-the-ex-wants-you-back/" ["pubdate"]=> string(31) "Fri, 13 Sep 2019 10:51:03 +0000" ["dc"]=> array(1) { ["creator"]=> string(21) "Kimberly Dawn Neumann" } ["category"]=> string(178) "Dating Issuesadvicebreaking upcheatingcommitmentcommunicationdatingDating Advicedealbreakersexeshonestylifelovelustmarriagemenpainrelationshipsrespectself-esteemthe exwisdomwomen" ["guid"]=> string(34) "https://blog.loveawake.com/?p=3026" ["description"]=> string(582) "

After interviewing so many people, I?ve heard stories about how getting back together was the best decision they ever made or the worst train wreck in history that ended with someone in jail. And everything in between. I suppose it really comes down to the two people involved and the motives at the heart of […]

The post What to Do When the Ex Wants You Back appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["content"]=> array(1) { ["encoded"]=> string(5247) "

After interviewing so many people, I?ve heard stories about how getting back together was the best decision they ever made or the worst train wreck in history that ended with someone in jail. And everything in between. I suppose it really comes down to the two people involved and the motives at the heart of it all to figure out if its going to stick or not. But what do you do when that person is you and your ex is trying to get you back?

If you?ve been avidly following my blog, you may have seen my post about being friends with the ex. Its possible to have a great friendship, but what happens when your ex starts breaking the ?friends only? rules? Here you are, in a good relationship/new relationship/exciting relationship/recovered your mojo phase/etc and up pops your ex with talk about how great the two of you were together, what if you tried one more time?

Oh great! What to do now?

  1. If you are in an ex?s cross-hairs, take a good look at your heart. Do you still have feelings for this person? We all know, at some level, that no current partner can stack up to a relationship ghost. So, it seems to me that taking the time you need to deal with your feelings may be a good idea. I?ll be honest here, if you?re dating a person who knows their own worth, they aren?t likely to wait around while you figure it all out? so think long and hard about this one. Did you really have a good thing worth going back to?
  2. If you don?t think its a good idea to try again, you?re going to have to be firm and stand your ground. It may mean losing someone you consider a ?friend.? But in my honest opinion, a friend isn?t someone who steps in the way of you moving forward in life, tries to manipulate your heart or sabotages a good thing. Your ex may be acting with pure intentions (or not) but if you don?t think you have something worth salvaging, then you?re going to need to walk away. Not only for the sake of your heart and anyone?s heart you?re involved with? but for the sake of your ex who needs to move on.
  3. Or are you somewhere in the middle? Maybe its a good idea? maybe its not a good idea. Maybe you might still have feelings for your ex, maybe not? Ok, you are firmly in the quick drying cement about to get rolled over by K-k-k-ka-ken in his cement roller. Take a look at a few things before you make a decision.

I know, I know? It?s flattering, in some ways, to have an ex want you back. And easy to get swept up in the moment of glorifying what you had in the past and dreaming that it might be worth resurrecting. I?m not here to say it never works out, because sometimes it really does. But most of the time you broke up because something was broken and if you throw over something great now for something that may or may not be fixable? well, love is risky. Beautifully risky anyway you slice it. Just consider your options carefully and make sure you?re dealing with reality and not wishful thinking.

The post What to Do When the Ex Wants You Back appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" } ["summary"]=> string(582) "

After interviewing so many people, I?ve heard stories about how getting back together was the best decision they ever made or the worst train wreck in history that ended with someone in jail. And everything in between. I suppose it really comes down to the two people involved and the motives at the heart of […]

The post What to Do When the Ex Wants You Back appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["atom_content"]=> string(5247) "

After interviewing so many people, I?ve heard stories about how getting back together was the best decision they ever made or the worst train wreck in history that ended with someone in jail. And everything in between. I suppose it really comes down to the two people involved and the motives at the heart of it all to figure out if its going to stick or not. But what do you do when that person is you and your ex is trying to get you back?

If you?ve been avidly following my blog, you may have seen my post about being friends with the ex. Its possible to have a great friendship, but what happens when your ex starts breaking the ?friends only? rules? Here you are, in a good relationship/new relationship/exciting relationship/recovered your mojo phase/etc and up pops your ex with talk about how great the two of you were together, what if you tried one more time?

Oh great! What to do now?

  1. If you are in an ex?s cross-hairs, take a good look at your heart. Do you still have feelings for this person? We all know, at some level, that no current partner can stack up to a relationship ghost. So, it seems to me that taking the time you need to deal with your feelings may be a good idea. I?ll be honest here, if you?re dating a person who knows their own worth, they aren?t likely to wait around while you figure it all out? so think long and hard about this one. Did you really have a good thing worth going back to?
  2. If you don?t think its a good idea to try again, you?re going to have to be firm and stand your ground. It may mean losing someone you consider a ?friend.? But in my honest opinion, a friend isn?t someone who steps in the way of you moving forward in life, tries to manipulate your heart or sabotages a good thing. Your ex may be acting with pure intentions (or not) but if you don?t think you have something worth salvaging, then you?re going to need to walk away. Not only for the sake of your heart and anyone?s heart you?re involved with? but for the sake of your ex who needs to move on.
  3. Or are you somewhere in the middle? Maybe its a good idea? maybe its not a good idea. Maybe you might still have feelings for your ex, maybe not? Ok, you are firmly in the quick drying cement about to get rolled over by K-k-k-ka-ken in his cement roller. Take a look at a few things before you make a decision.

I know, I know? It?s flattering, in some ways, to have an ex want you back. And easy to get swept up in the moment of glorifying what you had in the past and dreaming that it might be worth resurrecting. I?m not here to say it never works out, because sometimes it really does. But most of the time you broke up because something was broken and if you throw over something great now for something that may or may not be fixable? well, love is risky. Beautifully risky anyway you slice it. Just consider your options carefully and make sure you?re dealing with reality and not wishful thinking.

The post What to Do When the Ex Wants You Back appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["date_timestamp"]=> int(1568371863) } [2]=> array(11) { ["title"]=> string(53) "Age Gap: Is It Nothing but a Number in Relationships?" ["link"]=> string(43) "https://blog.loveawake.com/2019/09/11/3017/" ["pubdate"]=> string(31) "Wed, 11 Sep 2019 10:23:45 +0000" ["dc"]=> array(1) { ["creator"]=> string(15) "Stella Painfree" } ["category"]=> string(59) "Dating Adviceage gapdatingmenolderrelationshipswomenyounger" ["guid"]=> string(34) "https://blog.loveawake.com/?p=3017" ["description"]=> string(536) "

Why are we so attracted to older men? What appeals to us about a younger woman? What?s with the introduction of the high in demand cougar? Some of us believe age is just a number, others shudder at the thought of the words, ?old enough to be your?? But the reality is, we see age […]

The post Age Gap: Is It Nothing but a Number in Relationships? appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["content"]=> array(1) { ["encoded"]=> string(5845) "

Why are we so attracted to older men? What appeals to us about a younger woman? What?s with the introduction of the high in demand cougar? Some of us believe age is just a number, others shudder at the thought of the words, ?old enough to be your?? But the reality is, we see age gap lovin? all the time. But why? And does it work?

Why we want us some age gap lovin?

Hello Therapy!

We laugh at the idea of a woman having daddy issues or a man constantly needing to prove his masculinity, but the truth is, these are REAL problems. We do tend to feel the need to replace what mommy or daddy should have been and the importance of a mother and father figure should never be dismissed. Unfortunately, you?re not going to find it in between the sheets with a new lover.

What about someone who feels the need to take care of another person, you ask? That someone needs to get a puppy instead. This only feeds another?s need to be taken care of, leading the relationship to become nothing more than an ongoing business transaction.

Point being: deal with your issues in therapy because you won?t find resolution at the expense of someone else?s emotions.

Darwin? Are you there?

In a few weeks, I?ll be writing an amazing article on sexual selection and mating strategies (believe me, it?s fucking fascinating) but for now we?ll keep it short and sweet. Men like the younger ladies because of their fertility.. Women like older men because of the resources at their disposal.

If I were to get creative with the modern state of things (and this is just that- my creativity): an older woman likes the younger man because of his healthy sperm and younger men chase older woman because of their experience in caring for offspring. [That was fun, I feel like a scientist]

Things are obviously more complex than that, taking into account the existence of love.

Through the phases of life

There are critical phases in an individuals life that I don?t believe should be disturbed. For example, losing you virginity. When you?re dating an older person, one who?s shagged a good number of people since the loss of his/her V card, you might feel pressured to do something you?re not ready to do. And even if you?re okay with that NOW.. it?ll bite you in the ass LATER.

When I was 15, I dated a 19 year old (I dated older but they had the mental capacity of 13 year olds so they don?t count). This 19 year old needed something I couldn?t provide: nurturing. He had already experienced his teenage years and began to deprive me of my own. The relationship was much more harmful than that, but a big chunk of it can be blamed on the age gap in such a critical period.

Another example? You?re finishing school, ready to put your hard earned degree to work and your partner is ready to have children. Your adult life is yet to begin while your partner?s is ready for the game upgrade. This WILL affect you, regardless of how hard you try to ignore it.

There are, however, phases in life that 5-10 years don?t mean the same as they did when you were say, 15 years old. As you get older, the actual number shrinks in significance..

Is age nothing but a number?

Age is the number of years we?ve spent breathing on this earth. Some of us have breathed in a lot more than others.Therefore, age can be a lot more than just a number; age can be life experience.

Can it work?

Yes, of course it can work. It takes a specific match for age gap lovin? to flourish into a successful, healthy relationship. And really, the heart wants what the heart wants. Unfortunately, because of obstacles like unresolved childhood issues and the hard earned wisdom of life experience, age gap lovin? has less of a chance to survive. Eventually, the older of the two is going to get tired of mentoring and the younger one is going to crave hands on experience. And when this happens, the relationship will inevitably come crumbling down.

It?s also important to remember that not everyone wants a complex romantic relationship. Some are perfectly fine with a two-dimensional, sex or money driven relationship. Some enjoy playing daddy and others have completely separate lives to experience life at the rate of which they prefer.

NOTE: I?m obviously referring to the BIG age gaps.

So if you see a genuinely happy age gap lovin? couple, accept it and move on. It means they?ve conquered all obstacles and are just genuinely in love. They?re a lot better off than the rest of us, anyway.

The post Age Gap: Is It Nothing but a Number in Relationships? appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" } ["summary"]=> string(536) "

Why are we so attracted to older men? What appeals to us about a younger woman? What?s with the introduction of the high in demand cougar? Some of us believe age is just a number, others shudder at the thought of the words, ?old enough to be your?? But the reality is, we see age […]

The post Age Gap: Is It Nothing but a Number in Relationships? appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["atom_content"]=> string(5845) "

Why are we so attracted to older men? What appeals to us about a younger woman? What?s with the introduction of the high in demand cougar? Some of us believe age is just a number, others shudder at the thought of the words, ?old enough to be your?? But the reality is, we see age gap lovin? all the time. But why? And does it work?

Why we want us some age gap lovin?

Hello Therapy!

We laugh at the idea of a woman having daddy issues or a man constantly needing to prove his masculinity, but the truth is, these are REAL problems. We do tend to feel the need to replace what mommy or daddy should have been and the importance of a mother and father figure should never be dismissed. Unfortunately, you?re not going to find it in between the sheets with a new lover.

What about someone who feels the need to take care of another person, you ask? That someone needs to get a puppy instead. This only feeds another?s need to be taken care of, leading the relationship to become nothing more than an ongoing business transaction.

Point being: deal with your issues in therapy because you won?t find resolution at the expense of someone else?s emotions.

Darwin? Are you there?

In a few weeks, I?ll be writing an amazing article on sexual selection and mating strategies (believe me, it?s fucking fascinating) but for now we?ll keep it short and sweet. Men like the younger ladies because of their fertility.. Women like older men because of the resources at their disposal.

If I were to get creative with the modern state of things (and this is just that- my creativity): an older woman likes the younger man because of his healthy sperm and younger men chase older woman because of their experience in caring for offspring. [That was fun, I feel like a scientist]

Things are obviously more complex than that, taking into account the existence of love.

Through the phases of life

There are critical phases in an individuals life that I don?t believe should be disturbed. For example, losing you virginity. When you?re dating an older person, one who?s shagged a good number of people since the loss of his/her V card, you might feel pressured to do something you?re not ready to do. And even if you?re okay with that NOW.. it?ll bite you in the ass LATER.

When I was 15, I dated a 19 year old (I dated older but they had the mental capacity of 13 year olds so they don?t count). This 19 year old needed something I couldn?t provide: nurturing. He had already experienced his teenage years and began to deprive me of my own. The relationship was much more harmful than that, but a big chunk of it can be blamed on the age gap in such a critical period.

Another example? You?re finishing school, ready to put your hard earned degree to work and your partner is ready to have children. Your adult life is yet to begin while your partner?s is ready for the game upgrade. This WILL affect you, regardless of how hard you try to ignore it.

There are, however, phases in life that 5-10 years don?t mean the same as they did when you were say, 15 years old. As you get older, the actual number shrinks in significance..

Is age nothing but a number?

Age is the number of years we?ve spent breathing on this earth. Some of us have breathed in a lot more than others.Therefore, age can be a lot more than just a number; age can be life experience.

Can it work?

Yes, of course it can work. It takes a specific match for age gap lovin? to flourish into a successful, healthy relationship. And really, the heart wants what the heart wants. Unfortunately, because of obstacles like unresolved childhood issues and the hard earned wisdom of life experience, age gap lovin? has less of a chance to survive. Eventually, the older of the two is going to get tired of mentoring and the younger one is going to crave hands on experience. And when this happens, the relationship will inevitably come crumbling down.

It?s also important to remember that not everyone wants a complex romantic relationship. Some are perfectly fine with a two-dimensional, sex or money driven relationship. Some enjoy playing daddy and others have completely separate lives to experience life at the rate of which they prefer.

NOTE: I?m obviously referring to the BIG age gaps.

So if you see a genuinely happy age gap lovin? couple, accept it and move on. It means they?ve conquered all obstacles and are just genuinely in love. They?re a lot better off than the rest of us, anyway.

The post Age Gap: Is It Nothing but a Number in Relationships? appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["date_timestamp"]=> int(1568197425) } [3]=> array(11) { ["title"]=> string(46) "Dating and Relationship Poison: His Glingly Ex" ["link"]=> string(84) "https://blog.loveawake.com/2019/09/11/dating-and-relationship-poison-his-glingly-ex/" ["pubdate"]=> string(31) "Wed, 11 Sep 2019 09:59:34 +0000" ["dc"]=> array(1) { ["creator"]=> string(15) "Stella Painfree" } ["category"]=> string(56) "Dating IssuesadviceDating AdviceExpoisonousrelationships" ["guid"]=> string(34) "https://blog.loveawake.com/?p=3014" ["description"]=> string(611) "

He?s hot, he?s romantic and witty, and his smile could bring a dead baby bird back to life; your new boyfriend is everything you?ve always dreamed of and yet never imagined could possibly exist. Everything in your relationship is picture perfect except the 3rd leg of the tripod: his clingy, needy, nutcase of an ex. How […]

The post Dating and Relationship Poison: His Glingly Ex appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["content"]=> array(1) { ["encoded"]=> string(4497) "

He?s hot, he?s romantic and witty, and his smile could bring a dead baby bird back to life; your new boyfriend is everything you?ve always dreamed of and yet never imagined could possibly exist. Everything in your relationship is picture perfect except the 3rd leg of the tripod: his clingy, needy, nutcase of an ex. How do you cope?

We love talking EX on this site. As you get older the number of parasitic exes just continues to grow; like a fucking cancer. There?s the EX who leaves inside jokes on your boyfriend?s Facebook wall. There?s the EX who calls in the middle of night, drunk, needing a ride because she?s stranded at a creepy biker bar. And let?s not forget the EX who happens to have every possible relationship problem with her new boyfriend and constantly needs to ?chat? at the most inopportune times. Mother Fucker. Being with someone who?s still responsive to such a cling machine can cause havoc in your love life. Let?s deal with it.

Understanding WHY Your Man Answers The Cling Call

First of all, let?s assume your dude?s not a douche and that he actually took the time to get over his EX before starting a relationship with you. (Warning: Unless you?ve got irrefutable evidence that proves otherwise, suspicions are usually in your head, psycho.)

Not all relationships end with a positive pregnancy test, a slap in the face, and slashed tires. Sometimes people simply grow apart or become closer friends than lovers. In such cases, a sense of obligation can exist. It?s almost as if to say, ?Just because we?re not fucking anymore doesn?t mean I should be a shitty person and not be there for you in a time of need.?

The problem isn?t that your boyfriend gave her a ride home from that one sketch bar that one time. It?s that, like clockwork, every Friday night at 1:57 am, she?s stranded with a guy name Bubba trying to rape her. This means she?s taking advantage of his ?sense of obligation? and perhaps even misinterpreting it to mean something more. Surely, he MUST still love me! Look at him come to my rescue!

It?s hard to tell someone you were once romantically involved with to stop calling in times of need, especially if it ended on good terms. It doesn?t mean he loves you any less or that he?s still holding on to the past; it may just mean he?s a good cat and can?t find the words FUCK OFF in his current vocabulary.

What to Do (Cause You Obviously Have to Do Something)

Now that you understand: you?re zen, you?re Buddha, you?re at peace with the situation and no longer have nightmares. But does that mean you?re okay with it? Does that mean that it?s not wrecking havoc in your relationship? This cling affair has got to stop and you?re going to have to do something about it.

?what not to do

DO NOT, under ANY circumstances, directly contact the EX in question. I know you think you?re defending your territory but she?ll only masturbate to the fact she?s gotten to you. Also, most men find it grossly unattractive to see a woman go bat-shit crazy. So keep your poise, don?t get your panties in a bunch and don?t make a fool of yourself.

?what you need to do

Is talk to your boyfriend. Tell him you?ve been more than understanding and that if there?s an emergency or she really is going through something you won?t be the one to stand in the way but that being at her beck n? call is hurting your relationship. The best thing to do is be open about how you feel and , as always, ask him how he?d feel if the rolls were reversed. If he?s chicken shit about breaking the news to the clingy EX, help him through it and come up with a sane, kind way together. What?s important is that he gets the message and you retain your dignity.

The post Dating and Relationship Poison: His Glingly Ex appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" } ["summary"]=> string(611) "

He?s hot, he?s romantic and witty, and his smile could bring a dead baby bird back to life; your new boyfriend is everything you?ve always dreamed of and yet never imagined could possibly exist. Everything in your relationship is picture perfect except the 3rd leg of the tripod: his clingy, needy, nutcase of an ex. How […]

The post Dating and Relationship Poison: His Glingly Ex appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["atom_content"]=> string(4497) "

He?s hot, he?s romantic and witty, and his smile could bring a dead baby bird back to life; your new boyfriend is everything you?ve always dreamed of and yet never imagined could possibly exist. Everything in your relationship is picture perfect except the 3rd leg of the tripod: his clingy, needy, nutcase of an ex. How do you cope?

We love talking EX on this site. As you get older the number of parasitic exes just continues to grow; like a fucking cancer. There?s the EX who leaves inside jokes on your boyfriend?s Facebook wall. There?s the EX who calls in the middle of night, drunk, needing a ride because she?s stranded at a creepy biker bar. And let?s not forget the EX who happens to have every possible relationship problem with her new boyfriend and constantly needs to ?chat? at the most inopportune times. Mother Fucker. Being with someone who?s still responsive to such a cling machine can cause havoc in your love life. Let?s deal with it.

Understanding WHY Your Man Answers The Cling Call

First of all, let?s assume your dude?s not a douche and that he actually took the time to get over his EX before starting a relationship with you. (Warning: Unless you?ve got irrefutable evidence that proves otherwise, suspicions are usually in your head, psycho.)

Not all relationships end with a positive pregnancy test, a slap in the face, and slashed tires. Sometimes people simply grow apart or become closer friends than lovers. In such cases, a sense of obligation can exist. It?s almost as if to say, ?Just because we?re not fucking anymore doesn?t mean I should be a shitty person and not be there for you in a time of need.?

The problem isn?t that your boyfriend gave her a ride home from that one sketch bar that one time. It?s that, like clockwork, every Friday night at 1:57 am, she?s stranded with a guy name Bubba trying to rape her. This means she?s taking advantage of his ?sense of obligation? and perhaps even misinterpreting it to mean something more. Surely, he MUST still love me! Look at him come to my rescue!

It?s hard to tell someone you were once romantically involved with to stop calling in times of need, especially if it ended on good terms. It doesn?t mean he loves you any less or that he?s still holding on to the past; it may just mean he?s a good cat and can?t find the words FUCK OFF in his current vocabulary.

What to Do (Cause You Obviously Have to Do Something)

Now that you understand: you?re zen, you?re Buddha, you?re at peace with the situation and no longer have nightmares. But does that mean you?re okay with it? Does that mean that it?s not wrecking havoc in your relationship? This cling affair has got to stop and you?re going to have to do something about it.

?what not to do

DO NOT, under ANY circumstances, directly contact the EX in question. I know you think you?re defending your territory but she?ll only masturbate to the fact she?s gotten to you. Also, most men find it grossly unattractive to see a woman go bat-shit crazy. So keep your poise, don?t get your panties in a bunch and don?t make a fool of yourself.

?what you need to do

Is talk to your boyfriend. Tell him you?ve been more than understanding and that if there?s an emergency or she really is going through something you won?t be the one to stand in the way but that being at her beck n? call is hurting your relationship. The best thing to do is be open about how you feel and , as always, ask him how he?d feel if the rolls were reversed. If he?s chicken shit about breaking the news to the clingy EX, help him through it and come up with a sane, kind way together. What?s important is that he gets the message and you retain your dignity.

The post Dating and Relationship Poison: His Glingly Ex appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["date_timestamp"]=> int(1568195974) } [4]=> array(11) { ["title"]=> string(46) "Dating and Relationship Poison: Over Analyzing" ["link"]=> string(84) "https://blog.loveawake.com/2019/09/10/dating-and-relationship-poison-over-analyzing/" ["pubdate"]=> string(31) "Tue, 10 Sep 2019 15:16:13 +0000" ["dc"]=> array(1) { ["creator"]=> string(9) "Alex Wise" } ["category"]=> string(41) "Dating AdviceAnalyzingdatingrelationships" ["guid"]=> string(34) "https://blog.loveawake.com/?p=3011" ["description"]=> string(581) "

You wake up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat and ponder in a craze, ?What if?? Earlier that night, you had been out with your new pseudo fling and although the dinner had gone wonderfully, he ended the evening with the most ambiguous statement ever, leaving you cross eyed for the […]

The post Dating and Relationship Poison: Over Analyzing appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["content"]=> array(1) { ["encoded"]=> string(5631) "

You wake up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat and ponder in a craze, ?What if?? Earlier that night, you had been out with your new pseudo fling and although the dinner had gone wonderfully, he ended the evening with the most ambiguous statement ever, leaving you cross eyed for the rest of the night. By the time your alarm clock goes off in the morning, you?ve decided that he?s an international gay spy who is paid to experiment with the woman clitoris. And this is the most likely of all your theories.

Our child-like imaginations take over the second a question is left unanswered. But what kind of damage is this doing to your relationships?

Over analyzing before anything even exists

?is the mark of a crazy person, right? Yet you?d be surprised to know how many people interpret the most meaningless of acts as declarations of love. If you tend to plan the wedding before the two of you are actually introduced, steer clear of making any assumptions until you hear the words, ?I?m into you.? Know that a compliment doesn?t imply an intention to shag and that friends can share a dinner without it being an invitation to exchange bodily fluids.

Dating and over analyzing

Just like an ultimatum, over analyzing can end a relationship before it begins. Unfortunately, the dating phase is when we are most likely to analyze the smallest of things. You?re vulnerable, uncertain of where your relationship stands and have yet to develop a secure method of communication. In other words: you?re fucked. You?re left alone with the ?incident?, your feelings for the person, and your over active imagination ? a recipe for disaster.

Perhaps you haven?t had the best dating experiences; you?ve been repeatedly turned down with grade A excuses. Poor chap has to go take care of his ill mother? You dive into, ?But he told me last week they had gone food shopping! She can?t be THAT sick! He?s got to be lying.? Or maybe you had your legs open in the car, invited him up for a ?cup of coffee? and he turned you down. You deduce he?s either not into you, gay or running home to his other girlfriend. What if he had diarrhea? (Don?t laugh, these things happen)

Or even worst. Your interest says, ?I?m not into you? but when your arms brush while in line to order food you can?t help but wonder whether it done on purpose.

Here?s the problem: the dating phase is full of uncertainties. You?re trying to display your best assets; the last thing you want to do is constantly ask, ?Wait. Remember when you said ???? What EXACTLY did you mean by that?? over and over again. So you keep your mouth shut.. go home and ask the Ouija board instead.

Relationships and over Analyzing

At this point, there is really no excuse for being so unreasonably over analytical. You should be able to communicate your worries and fears without judgment. Over analyzing can create an affair out of thin air, leading you to believe your partner is screwing his/her boss. This boss happens to look like an over weight, drug addicted cow, but you wouldn?t know because you?ve never asked.

When in a committed relationship, we tend to feel safe enough to shed our masks. We no longer worry so much about how little acts will be interpreted because we just assume our partners will approach us if there is any confusion. Wrong. If you don?t keep an open door to communication, your imagination WILL run free; running your relationship straight into death and destruction.

Putting the knife down- How to stop

Whether you realize it or not, you?re slashing your relationship, or potential relationship, to pieces when you let your imagination take over. How you feel about this person is going to affect the direction your imagination takes. If you?re already suspicious over certain behavior, you?ll interpret an act as validation of your suspicions. If you?re head over heels for someone, you?ll interpret the behavior as a ?sign? that he/she is into you.

So you?re fucked either way.

How to stop the brutal snowball effect into a world of delusion? Open your mouth. If you?re worried about making a fool of yourself by asking someone whether or not they?re into you, don?t be. You?ll save yourself a lot of  embarrassment if you get an answer BEFORE you show up at their door in a wedding dress (which you shouldn?t be doing anyway, but you know what I mean)

Wondering if his new porn video purchase means he?s no longer into shagging you? Ask him. You?ll be surprised to hear, ?No, in fact.. let?s watch it together.?

You?re never going to have all the pieces to complete a puzzle. Forcing them to fit and grabbing pieces from other puzzles to complete it won?t give you the same result. So save yourself the mess and embarrassment, swallow your pride and just ASK.

Other Dating and Relationship Poisons:

Ultimatums

The post Dating and Relationship Poison: Over Analyzing appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" } ["summary"]=> string(581) "

You wake up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat and ponder in a craze, ?What if?? Earlier that night, you had been out with your new pseudo fling and although the dinner had gone wonderfully, he ended the evening with the most ambiguous statement ever, leaving you cross eyed for the […]

The post Dating and Relationship Poison: Over Analyzing appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["atom_content"]=> string(5631) "

You wake up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat and ponder in a craze, ?What if?? Earlier that night, you had been out with your new pseudo fling and although the dinner had gone wonderfully, he ended the evening with the most ambiguous statement ever, leaving you cross eyed for the rest of the night. By the time your alarm clock goes off in the morning, you?ve decided that he?s an international gay spy who is paid to experiment with the woman clitoris. And this is the most likely of all your theories.

Our child-like imaginations take over the second a question is left unanswered. But what kind of damage is this doing to your relationships?

Over analyzing before anything even exists

?is the mark of a crazy person, right? Yet you?d be surprised to know how many people interpret the most meaningless of acts as declarations of love. If you tend to plan the wedding before the two of you are actually introduced, steer clear of making any assumptions until you hear the words, ?I?m into you.? Know that a compliment doesn?t imply an intention to shag and that friends can share a dinner without it being an invitation to exchange bodily fluids.

Dating and over analyzing

Just like an ultimatum, over analyzing can end a relationship before it begins. Unfortunately, the dating phase is when we are most likely to analyze the smallest of things. You?re vulnerable, uncertain of where your relationship stands and have yet to develop a secure method of communication. In other words: you?re fucked. You?re left alone with the ?incident?, your feelings for the person, and your over active imagination ? a recipe for disaster.

Perhaps you haven?t had the best dating experiences; you?ve been repeatedly turned down with grade A excuses. Poor chap has to go take care of his ill mother? You dive into, ?But he told me last week they had gone food shopping! She can?t be THAT sick! He?s got to be lying.? Or maybe you had your legs open in the car, invited him up for a ?cup of coffee? and he turned you down. You deduce he?s either not into you, gay or running home to his other girlfriend. What if he had diarrhea? (Don?t laugh, these things happen)

Or even worst. Your interest says, ?I?m not into you? but when your arms brush while in line to order food you can?t help but wonder whether it done on purpose.

Here?s the problem: the dating phase is full of uncertainties. You?re trying to display your best assets; the last thing you want to do is constantly ask, ?Wait. Remember when you said ???? What EXACTLY did you mean by that?? over and over again. So you keep your mouth shut.. go home and ask the Ouija board instead.

Relationships and over Analyzing

At this point, there is really no excuse for being so unreasonably over analytical. You should be able to communicate your worries and fears without judgment. Over analyzing can create an affair out of thin air, leading you to believe your partner is screwing his/her boss. This boss happens to look like an over weight, drug addicted cow, but you wouldn?t know because you?ve never asked.

When in a committed relationship, we tend to feel safe enough to shed our masks. We no longer worry so much about how little acts will be interpreted because we just assume our partners will approach us if there is any confusion. Wrong. If you don?t keep an open door to communication, your imagination WILL run free; running your relationship straight into death and destruction.

Putting the knife down- How to stop

Whether you realize it or not, you?re slashing your relationship, or potential relationship, to pieces when you let your imagination take over. How you feel about this person is going to affect the direction your imagination takes. If you?re already suspicious over certain behavior, you?ll interpret an act as validation of your suspicions. If you?re head over heels for someone, you?ll interpret the behavior as a ?sign? that he/she is into you.

So you?re fucked either way.

How to stop the brutal snowball effect into a world of delusion? Open your mouth. If you?re worried about making a fool of yourself by asking someone whether or not they?re into you, don?t be. You?ll save yourself a lot of  embarrassment if you get an answer BEFORE you show up at their door in a wedding dress (which you shouldn?t be doing anyway, but you know what I mean)

Wondering if his new porn video purchase means he?s no longer into shagging you? Ask him. You?ll be surprised to hear, ?No, in fact.. let?s watch it together.?

You?re never going to have all the pieces to complete a puzzle. Forcing them to fit and grabbing pieces from other puzzles to complete it won?t give you the same result. So save yourself the mess and embarrassment, swallow your pride and just ASK.

Other Dating and Relationship Poisons:

Ultimatums

The post Dating and Relationship Poison: Over Analyzing appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["date_timestamp"]=> int(1568128573) } [5]=> array(11) { ["title"]=> string(45) "Dating and Relationship Poison: The Ultimatum" ["link"]=> string(83) "https://blog.loveawake.com/2019/09/10/dating-and-relationship-poison-the-ultimatum/" ["pubdate"]=> string(31) "Tue, 10 Sep 2019 15:03:00 +0000" ["dc"]=> array(1) { ["creator"]=> string(9) "Alex Wise" } ["category"]=> string(40) "Dating IssuesdatingRelationshipUltimatum" ["guid"]=> string(34) "https://blog.loveawake.com/?p=3008" ["description"]=> string(601) "

It worked on your older brother and made you the king of the playground; ultimatums are a sure way of getting what we want. And because we?re greedy, selfish fucks, we let it casually drift into the phase of adulthood that we are most hungry and unwilling to compromise; romance. Lack the communication skills to […]

The post Dating and Relationship Poison: The Ultimatum appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["content"]=> array(1) { ["encoded"]=> string(6693) "

It worked on your older brother and made you the king of the playground; ultimatums are a sure way of getting what we want. And because we?re greedy, selfish fucks, we let it casually drift into the phase of adulthood that we are most hungry and unwilling to compromise; romance. Lack the communication skills to express your feelings on a subject? Want to get him to contribute to housework but just don?t know how? No problem, just threaten. And use every weapon you can to do so.

Ultimatums can be used at any point of the relationship rainbow. But as you?re piling up your winning chips, your relationship is slowly dying and deteriorating.

Dating Ultimatums:

Getting comfortable with giving ultimatums early on is a recipe for disaster. This is how you get your relationship to fail before it even begins. The dating phase should be the most lax color of the rainbow. At no point should you huff and puff about having to do something during this magical time. And in no way are YOU in any position to demand any sort of life changes from someone who hasn?t even committed themselves to you.

Got feelings for a friend? ?If you don?t date me, we can?t be friends? will never work. Either the answer is no and you lose a friend or the answer is yes, the person feels forced, and the relationship plummets due to lack of interest. (Feel free to pass this on, this could save a lot of friendships.. because really, can men and women just be friends? )

Relationship Ultimatums:

At the beginning it?s all about trying to please and impress the opposite sex in order to get laid (right Darwin?) but once you?re shagging on the regular, it?s easy to ask yourself, ?but what about what want?? As your relationship becomes more and more serious, it becomes more of a chore to get your partner to do what you want and to reciprocate by doing things you definitely don?t feel like doing. It?s easy to succomb to the simplicity of an ultimatum.

But guess what? Ultimatums are the quickest way to build resentment in a relationship. If you make me do something I don?t want to do too often, I will hate you. Remember when you were a teenager and your parents CONSTANTLY threatened you? You ended most days slamming the door in their face and hating them for making you choose your math homework over your Sega Genesis. And although parenting is a completely different issue, would you want your partner building that sort of resentment towards you? Stop it.

Two of the Deadliest Ultimatums

  1. Marriage: Threatening to leave if your partner doesn?t agree to marry you or propose is a big NO NO. You?re entitled to want marriage within a certain time frame but by giving this ultimatum you might be signing someone up for a task he/she is NOT prepared for. Marriage is a big step. This mistake can lead to infidelity, an early divorce, being ditched at the alter and triggers an overall mess. If you refuse to listen and decide to threaten anyway, be prepared to walk away if the answer is no. And know that being with someone who doesn?t want to marry you is something YOU can?t do as an individual, and that is why you?re giving him the choice. Don?t threaten because you think the thought of losing you will scare your partner into taking the plunge.
  2. Using sex: Sex is not a form of currency. You shouldn?t bribe your partner into doing something by offering a sexual favor in return. Once or twice is not a big deal -just make sure it?s done playfully and not as a business transaction. But the second it becomes a habit, sex will no longer be intimate and you?ll inevitably begin feeling like a whore.

When is it okay?

If ever in doubt, ask yourself whether or not you?re prepared to actually walk. That?s how you know the subject is not something you?re willing to compromise on. You should also not use the threat lightly; if the outcome doesn?t result in your favor be prepared to pack your bags.

The Difference Between a Compromise and an Ultimatum

?is you CHOOSE to do it and are not tricked or FORCED into doing it.

Let?s face it, relationships are about compromise and sacrifice. You give up a little bit of this and a little bit of that, but it?s never an issue because they?re nothing compared to the joy of being with your partner.

The key? Communication.

The wording plays a huge role. If you come off sounding like a dictator, demanding something to happen? your partner will hate you and eventually revolt. What you need to learn to do is analyze your demands and try to get your partner to understand the reason you feel the way you do.

Be vocal. Your partner should see something genuinely making you unhappy and want to change it. If he/she feels it an unreasonable request, you discuss it and find a way in the middle. When both partners feel involved in the decision making, it leads to an overall sense of happiness and contribution. One doesn?t feel slave to the other and doesn?t build resentment over feeling ?controlled.?

You weren?t granted the title ?King? or ?Queen?.. Stop trying to use force and abuse to get what you want in life. What?s next, are you going to try a temper tantrum?

The post Dating and Relationship Poison: The Ultimatum appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" } ["summary"]=> string(601) "

It worked on your older brother and made you the king of the playground; ultimatums are a sure way of getting what we want. And because we?re greedy, selfish fucks, we let it casually drift into the phase of adulthood that we are most hungry and unwilling to compromise; romance. Lack the communication skills to […]

The post Dating and Relationship Poison: The Ultimatum appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["atom_content"]=> string(6693) "

It worked on your older brother and made you the king of the playground; ultimatums are a sure way of getting what we want. And because we?re greedy, selfish fucks, we let it casually drift into the phase of adulthood that we are most hungry and unwilling to compromise; romance. Lack the communication skills to express your feelings on a subject? Want to get him to contribute to housework but just don?t know how? No problem, just threaten. And use every weapon you can to do so.

Ultimatums can be used at any point of the relationship rainbow. But as you?re piling up your winning chips, your relationship is slowly dying and deteriorating.

Dating Ultimatums:

Getting comfortable with giving ultimatums early on is a recipe for disaster. This is how you get your relationship to fail before it even begins. The dating phase should be the most lax color of the rainbow. At no point should you huff and puff about having to do something during this magical time. And in no way are YOU in any position to demand any sort of life changes from someone who hasn?t even committed themselves to you.

Got feelings for a friend? ?If you don?t date me, we can?t be friends? will never work. Either the answer is no and you lose a friend or the answer is yes, the person feels forced, and the relationship plummets due to lack of interest. (Feel free to pass this on, this could save a lot of friendships.. because really, can men and women just be friends? )

Relationship Ultimatums:

At the beginning it?s all about trying to please and impress the opposite sex in order to get laid (right Darwin?) but once you?re shagging on the regular, it?s easy to ask yourself, ?but what about what want?? As your relationship becomes more and more serious, it becomes more of a chore to get your partner to do what you want and to reciprocate by doing things you definitely don?t feel like doing. It?s easy to succomb to the simplicity of an ultimatum.

But guess what? Ultimatums are the quickest way to build resentment in a relationship. If you make me do something I don?t want to do too often, I will hate you. Remember when you were a teenager and your parents CONSTANTLY threatened you? You ended most days slamming the door in their face and hating them for making you choose your math homework over your Sega Genesis. And although parenting is a completely different issue, would you want your partner building that sort of resentment towards you? Stop it.

Two of the Deadliest Ultimatums

  1. Marriage: Threatening to leave if your partner doesn?t agree to marry you or propose is a big NO NO. You?re entitled to want marriage within a certain time frame but by giving this ultimatum you might be signing someone up for a task he/she is NOT prepared for. Marriage is a big step. This mistake can lead to infidelity, an early divorce, being ditched at the alter and triggers an overall mess. If you refuse to listen and decide to threaten anyway, be prepared to walk away if the answer is no. And know that being with someone who doesn?t want to marry you is something YOU can?t do as an individual, and that is why you?re giving him the choice. Don?t threaten because you think the thought of losing you will scare your partner into taking the plunge.
  2. Using sex: Sex is not a form of currency. You shouldn?t bribe your partner into doing something by offering a sexual favor in return. Once or twice is not a big deal -just make sure it?s done playfully and not as a business transaction. But the second it becomes a habit, sex will no longer be intimate and you?ll inevitably begin feeling like a whore.

When is it okay?

If ever in doubt, ask yourself whether or not you?re prepared to actually walk. That?s how you know the subject is not something you?re willing to compromise on. You should also not use the threat lightly; if the outcome doesn?t result in your favor be prepared to pack your bags.

The Difference Between a Compromise and an Ultimatum

?is you CHOOSE to do it and are not tricked or FORCED into doing it.

Let?s face it, relationships are about compromise and sacrifice. You give up a little bit of this and a little bit of that, but it?s never an issue because they?re nothing compared to the joy of being with your partner.

The key? Communication.

The wording plays a huge role. If you come off sounding like a dictator, demanding something to happen? your partner will hate you and eventually revolt. What you need to learn to do is analyze your demands and try to get your partner to understand the reason you feel the way you do.

Be vocal. Your partner should see something genuinely making you unhappy and want to change it. If he/she feels it an unreasonable request, you discuss it and find a way in the middle. When both partners feel involved in the decision making, it leads to an overall sense of happiness and contribution. One doesn?t feel slave to the other and doesn?t build resentment over feeling ?controlled.?

You weren?t granted the title ?King? or ?Queen?.. Stop trying to use force and abuse to get what you want in life. What?s next, are you going to try a temper tantrum?

The post Dating and Relationship Poison: The Ultimatum appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["date_timestamp"]=> int(1568127780) } [6]=> array(11) { ["title"]=> string(29) "Social Media Dating Etiquette" ["link"]=> string(68) "https://blog.loveawake.com/2019/09/09/social-media-dating-etiquette/" ["pubdate"]=> string(31) "Mon, 09 Sep 2019 15:19:30 +0000" ["dc"]=> array(1) { ["creator"]=> string(21) "Kimberly Dawn Neumann" } ["category"]=> string(211) "Being SingleDating Advicebreaking upcheatingcommunicationCulturedatingdefine the relationshipfacebookfriendfriendslifelovemenmyspaceonline datingpublicrelationship statusrelationshipsrespectsocial mediawallwomen" ["guid"]=> string(34) "https://blog.loveawake.com/?p=3002" ["description"]=> string(551) "

?So, I got this INSANE email from some girl claiming to be his girlfriend on Facebook today?? Raise your hand if you or a friend have started off a story like that since entering the world of social media. (OK, you can put your hand down now? your co-workers might be wondering?)  A guy friend […]

The post Social Media Dating Etiquette appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["content"]=> array(1) { ["encoded"]=> string(6332) "

?So, I got this INSANE email from some girl claiming to be his girlfriend on Facebook today??

Raise your hand if you or a friend have started off a story like that since entering the world of social media. (OK, you can put your hand down now? your co-workers might be wondering?)  A guy friend of mine recently told me about some girl who is mad at him for breaking up with her and is contacting every new person he ?friends,? telling them that he?s a womanizer with herpes.

And lest you think it?s all crazy chickswomen are all too well aware of some men?s desire to mark their territory with excessive public posts, posting pictures on her wall, claiming a relationship status that may or may not be appropriate or even asking her out via public message on a Facebook or Myspace wall.

Unfortunately, in the world of social media, it goes both ways. Men AND women can get a little nuts when exposed to an opportunity to publicly mark territory. And thanks to things like the ?relationship status,? you are now required to have a DTR (Define The Relationship conversation) at every stage of the dating game just to make sure you?re on the same page.

First date last night and Facebook friends? DTR. You kissed? DTR. Your friend went out with her at some point? DTR. You?re not ready to be exclusive? DTR. Ready to be exclusive? DTR. Ready to change your relationship status on Facebook? DTR. Want to post pictures from last weekend? DTR. Etc. etc. and so forth. In order to stay clear with each other about what?s acceptable a to post in public and what?s not? that dreaded DTR pops up right and left with a stealth that surprises even the most veteran of daters.

I get a lot of etiquette questions from daters about social media, so here are my answers to some of the biggies. I?d love to hear if you have a different rule of thumb that works better for you?

Q: When do I change my ?relationship status??

A: When you BOTH agree that you are OK with going public as an exclusive couple (and that people will be talking/asking about it.) If you break up ? at any point that it feels right to you to publicly sever that tie. If you know you are the type to do the break up/get back together cycle? please spare us the drama of changing your relationship status with every up and down.

Q: When can I post a picture of the two of us as my main profile picture?

A: When you both agree that it?s a good picture and your significant other doesn?t mind being pictured as your other half. (And you are skilled at ignoring gagging noises from your friends)

Q: When can I contact someone my date ?friended? and let them know that he/she is taken?

A: NEVER. If you do this, you look like a crazy person ? no matter what. If your date isn?t making it clear that they are off the market, you need to talk to your date and not the people they ?friend.? (A side note on this, don?t get mad at the girl your ?boyfriend? asks out. The girl isn?t the person cheating on you. The person cheating on you is the one who agreed to be in a relationship with you and stepped out with someone else. If you?re going to get mad, direct it at the right person.)

Q: When can I ?friend? my date?s friends?

A: This one is a bit tricky. The safest rule of thumb? let his/her friends approach you with a friend request. Keep in mind that these are also people who will have access to your profile should you and their friend have a nasty break up. Are you going to de-friend them if that happens?

Q: Do I friend someone I met on an online dating site before meeting them in person?

A: Only if you really have nothing to hide and/or want to give them access to more pictures/posts/etc. Also make sure that your private info like address and phone number aren?t public knowledge. (They really shouldn?t be anyway) Also, be careful about friending potentials before you know them because it can backfire if one or more of your potentials decide to go public with their interest.

Q: What do I do if someone is using my friend pool to increase their dating pool?

A: Personally, I don?t like cherry pickers. This one is up to you, but when they start crossing lines with my friends, I?ll typically issue a polite warning and if they don?t pay attention? the dreaded de-friend will occur.

Q: Do I believe someone who contacts me with information about the person I?m dating?

A: Personally, I tend to only believe with verification. Example? I?ve noticed actions that correlate to what this person is saying about my date. I?d never break it off with someone because someone contacted me with bad info, but it could precipitate a difficult conversation with my date.

All in all, social media requires a greater understanding of not only respect and communication but common sense in how to react to your life becoming public property. If you value your privacy, let the person you?re dating know how much of your life you are comfortable having in the public domain. Some people just have different standards of what?s appropriate and may not understand that posting that cutesy kissing picture of the two of you is not something that you appreciate.

The post Social Media Dating Etiquette appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" } ["summary"]=> string(551) "

?So, I got this INSANE email from some girl claiming to be his girlfriend on Facebook today?? Raise your hand if you or a friend have started off a story like that since entering the world of social media. (OK, you can put your hand down now? your co-workers might be wondering?)  A guy friend […]

The post Social Media Dating Etiquette appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["atom_content"]=> string(6332) "

?So, I got this INSANE email from some girl claiming to be his girlfriend on Facebook today??

Raise your hand if you or a friend have started off a story like that since entering the world of social media. (OK, you can put your hand down now? your co-workers might be wondering?)  A guy friend of mine recently told me about some girl who is mad at him for breaking up with her and is contacting every new person he ?friends,? telling them that he?s a womanizer with herpes.

And lest you think it?s all crazy chickswomen are all too well aware of some men?s desire to mark their territory with excessive public posts, posting pictures on her wall, claiming a relationship status that may or may not be appropriate or even asking her out via public message on a Facebook or Myspace wall.

Unfortunately, in the world of social media, it goes both ways. Men AND women can get a little nuts when exposed to an opportunity to publicly mark territory. And thanks to things like the ?relationship status,? you are now required to have a DTR (Define The Relationship conversation) at every stage of the dating game just to make sure you?re on the same page.

First date last night and Facebook friends? DTR. You kissed? DTR. Your friend went out with her at some point? DTR. You?re not ready to be exclusive? DTR. Ready to be exclusive? DTR. Ready to change your relationship status on Facebook? DTR. Want to post pictures from last weekend? DTR. Etc. etc. and so forth. In order to stay clear with each other about what?s acceptable a to post in public and what?s not? that dreaded DTR pops up right and left with a stealth that surprises even the most veteran of daters.

I get a lot of etiquette questions from daters about social media, so here are my answers to some of the biggies. I?d love to hear if you have a different rule of thumb that works better for you?

Q: When do I change my ?relationship status??

A: When you BOTH agree that you are OK with going public as an exclusive couple (and that people will be talking/asking about it.) If you break up ? at any point that it feels right to you to publicly sever that tie. If you know you are the type to do the break up/get back together cycle? please spare us the drama of changing your relationship status with every up and down.

Q: When can I post a picture of the two of us as my main profile picture?

A: When you both agree that it?s a good picture and your significant other doesn?t mind being pictured as your other half. (And you are skilled at ignoring gagging noises from your friends)

Q: When can I contact someone my date ?friended? and let them know that he/she is taken?

A: NEVER. If you do this, you look like a crazy person ? no matter what. If your date isn?t making it clear that they are off the market, you need to talk to your date and not the people they ?friend.? (A side note on this, don?t get mad at the girl your ?boyfriend? asks out. The girl isn?t the person cheating on you. The person cheating on you is the one who agreed to be in a relationship with you and stepped out with someone else. If you?re going to get mad, direct it at the right person.)

Q: When can I ?friend? my date?s friends?

A: This one is a bit tricky. The safest rule of thumb? let his/her friends approach you with a friend request. Keep in mind that these are also people who will have access to your profile should you and their friend have a nasty break up. Are you going to de-friend them if that happens?

Q: Do I friend someone I met on an online dating site before meeting them in person?

A: Only if you really have nothing to hide and/or want to give them access to more pictures/posts/etc. Also make sure that your private info like address and phone number aren?t public knowledge. (They really shouldn?t be anyway) Also, be careful about friending potentials before you know them because it can backfire if one or more of your potentials decide to go public with their interest.

Q: What do I do if someone is using my friend pool to increase their dating pool?

A: Personally, I don?t like cherry pickers. This one is up to you, but when they start crossing lines with my friends, I?ll typically issue a polite warning and if they don?t pay attention? the dreaded de-friend will occur.

Q: Do I believe someone who contacts me with information about the person I?m dating?

A: Personally, I tend to only believe with verification. Example? I?ve noticed actions that correlate to what this person is saying about my date. I?d never break it off with someone because someone contacted me with bad info, but it could precipitate a difficult conversation with my date.

All in all, social media requires a greater understanding of not only respect and communication but common sense in how to react to your life becoming public property. If you value your privacy, let the person you?re dating know how much of your life you are comfortable having in the public domain. Some people just have different standards of what?s appropriate and may not understand that posting that cutesy kissing picture of the two of you is not something that you appreciate.

The post Social Media Dating Etiquette appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["date_timestamp"]=> int(1568042370) } [7]=> array(11) { ["title"]=> string(42) "Crazy Girl: Warning Signs And How To Avoid" ["link"]=> string(80) "https://blog.loveawake.com/2019/09/09/crazy-girl-warning-signs-and-how-to-avoid/" ["pubdate"]=> string(31) "Mon, 09 Sep 2019 14:45:36 +0000" ["dc"]=> array(1) { ["creator"]=> string(15) "Stella Painfree" } ["category"]=> string(160) "Dating IssuesattractioncommunicationcrazyDating Advicedealbreakersdramafirst datefriendshonestyHumorinconsistentlifelovelustmenpatternsrelationshipsrespectwomen" ["guid"]=> string(34) "https://blog.loveawake.com/?p=2999" ["description"]=> string(601) "

Confusing, man-eating, delicate flowers? yes, I know. Navigating the world of women when you are firmly in the Y chromosome category pose challenges that test the courage of many a man-child. Some men are lucky/smart enough to get a gal pal or two to decode the mysteries. Some men cannily do the research? things like […]

The post Crazy Girl: Warning Signs And How To Avoid appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["content"]=> array(1) { ["encoded"]=> string(7747) "

Confusing, man-eating, delicate flowers? yes, I know. Navigating the world of women when you are firmly in the Y chromosome category pose challenges that test the courage of many a man-child. Some men are lucky/smart enough to get a gal pal or two to decode the mysteries. Some men cannily do the research? things like reading good blogs on dating and mating in America or even getting a dating coach. But some poor sods continue to mope over a beer with the guys and bewail recent blunders, innocent mistakes and in short, continuing to make the same mistake again and again. Attracting the crazies.

I decided to crack the door on Pandora?s Box here and give you some tips that may or may not help you navigate away from the man-eating crazy flowers and find a woman who makes your toes curl. In a good way.

The first thing you need to get firmly in your head. Not all women are crazy. Only SOME women are crazy and if you keep picking the crazies, that says more about your picker than about women in general.

Toning your ?Picker? (or figuring out what is making you go for the crazy chicks all the time):

Attitudes that will attract and keep the crazies:

But you don?t like the crazies? You want to know how to avoid them? Watching your love-interest?s actions is the best piece of advice I can give you. Keep in mind that quality women will be doing the same thing to you. If you are running around hoping to attract a different breed of woman, then you need to be the kind of man a non-crazy woman will like.  If you are still playing games, collecting numbers, and going for the hook-up; not only are the quality women going to lose interest, they won?t even set you up with one of their friends. Some rules of thumb in attracting a quality woman:

  1. Be a quality guy. You don?t like flaky woman? Don?t be a flake yourself. If you say you?re going to call, call when you say you will. Show up when you say you?ll show up. Basically, be a man of your word.
  2. Cut all the past crazies out of your life (if you haven?t already.) It may seem harsh, but you?ve got to clean out your pool before someone else will want to get in. This means that ex-girlfriend whose rent you are still paying 2 years later, the recent ex who shows up unexpectedly from time to time, the girl who stalks your Facebook page and posts suggestive photos on your wall? you get my drift. The ones that are fun to talk about but no good, clean ?em out. (I am not talking about the ones you have a court order to support or if children are involved. For those situations go back to point number 1)
  3. Become more aware of who you flirt with and how you flirt. If you live by ?the game? then you?ll die by ?the game.? Remember that the quality women will be watching your actions before they get more involved with you. If crazy, drunk weekend hook-up Bob calls and asks for a date, you?re going to get shut down. If conversational, fun and classy Bob calls up for a date, the chances get a whole lot better for you.
  4. Continue to watch her actions for a while. Just because she passes dates 1-3 does not mean you have uncovered her lack of crazy, it just means she could be a great actress. Introduce her to your friends, the people you trust to read the barometer correctly and give them permission to be honest. If they flag the crazy, consider that you might have some more picker refining to do.
  5. Value sobriety. I know it can be more fun/easy to exist in that slight buzz to full on drunk when you are braving the social scene but it will not only attract the crazy, it will make it harder for you to spot the crazies AND will make the non-crazies look at the less drunk guy in a much better light. Stop making it so easy for your competition!

What are some of the ways you?ve discovered to uncover, avoid or spot the crazy?

The post Crazy Girl: Warning Signs And How To Avoid appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" } ["summary"]=> string(601) "

Confusing, man-eating, delicate flowers? yes, I know. Navigating the world of women when you are firmly in the Y chromosome category pose challenges that test the courage of many a man-child. Some men are lucky/smart enough to get a gal pal or two to decode the mysteries. Some men cannily do the research? things like […]

The post Crazy Girl: Warning Signs And How To Avoid appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["atom_content"]=> string(7747) "

Confusing, man-eating, delicate flowers? yes, I know. Navigating the world of women when you are firmly in the Y chromosome category pose challenges that test the courage of many a man-child. Some men are lucky/smart enough to get a gal pal or two to decode the mysteries. Some men cannily do the research? things like reading good blogs on dating and mating in America or even getting a dating coach. But some poor sods continue to mope over a beer with the guys and bewail recent blunders, innocent mistakes and in short, continuing to make the same mistake again and again. Attracting the crazies.

I decided to crack the door on Pandora?s Box here and give you some tips that may or may not help you navigate away from the man-eating crazy flowers and find a woman who makes your toes curl. In a good way.

The first thing you need to get firmly in your head. Not all women are crazy. Only SOME women are crazy and if you keep picking the crazies, that says more about your picker than about women in general.

Toning your ?Picker? (or figuring out what is making you go for the crazy chicks all the time):

Attitudes that will attract and keep the crazies:

But you don?t like the crazies? You want to know how to avoid them? Watching your love-interest?s actions is the best piece of advice I can give you. Keep in mind that quality women will be doing the same thing to you. If you are running around hoping to attract a different breed of woman, then you need to be the kind of man a non-crazy woman will like.  If you are still playing games, collecting numbers, and going for the hook-up; not only are the quality women going to lose interest, they won?t even set you up with one of their friends. Some rules of thumb in attracting a quality woman:

  1. Be a quality guy. You don?t like flaky woman? Don?t be a flake yourself. If you say you?re going to call, call when you say you will. Show up when you say you?ll show up. Basically, be a man of your word.
  2. Cut all the past crazies out of your life (if you haven?t already.) It may seem harsh, but you?ve got to clean out your pool before someone else will want to get in. This means that ex-girlfriend whose rent you are still paying 2 years later, the recent ex who shows up unexpectedly from time to time, the girl who stalks your Facebook page and posts suggestive photos on your wall? you get my drift. The ones that are fun to talk about but no good, clean ?em out. (I am not talking about the ones you have a court order to support or if children are involved. For those situations go back to point number 1)
  3. Become more aware of who you flirt with and how you flirt. If you live by ?the game? then you?ll die by ?the game.? Remember that the quality women will be watching your actions before they get more involved with you. If crazy, drunk weekend hook-up Bob calls and asks for a date, you?re going to get shut down. If conversational, fun and classy Bob calls up for a date, the chances get a whole lot better for you.
  4. Continue to watch her actions for a while. Just because she passes dates 1-3 does not mean you have uncovered her lack of crazy, it just means she could be a great actress. Introduce her to your friends, the people you trust to read the barometer correctly and give them permission to be honest. If they flag the crazy, consider that you might have some more picker refining to do.
  5. Value sobriety. I know it can be more fun/easy to exist in that slight buzz to full on drunk when you are braving the social scene but it will not only attract the crazy, it will make it harder for you to spot the crazies AND will make the non-crazies look at the less drunk guy in a much better light. Stop making it so easy for your competition!

What are some of the ways you?ve discovered to uncover, avoid or spot the crazy?

The post Crazy Girl: Warning Signs And How To Avoid appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["date_timestamp"]=> int(1568040336) } [8]=> array(11) { ["title"]=> string(34) "10 Rules To A Healthy Relationship" ["link"]=> string(73) "https://blog.loveawake.com/2019/09/06/10-rules-to-a-healthy-relationship/" ["pubdate"]=> string(31) "Fri, 06 Sep 2019 16:22:41 +0000" ["dc"]=> array(1) { ["creator"]=> string(9) "Alex Wise" } ["category"]=> string(40) "Dating Advicedatinglifetipsrelationships" ["guid"]=> string(34) "https://blog.loveawake.com/?p=2990" ["description"]=> string(589) "

Nothing sweeps anyone off their feet that falling in love. The thought of being in love with someone, and being loved back is the best feeling anyone can have.  It’s however easy for people in a relationship to argue or even disagree on certain things. Knowing how to handle various situations is however what keeps […]

The post 10 Rules To A Healthy Relationship appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["content"]=> array(1) { ["encoded"]=> string(4277) "

Nothing sweeps anyone off their feet that falling in love. The thought of being in love with someone, and being loved back is the best feeling anyone can have.  It’s however easy for people in a relationship to argue or even disagree on certain things. Knowing how to handle various situations is however what keeps the other person going, hence giving your relationship a second chance. Here are 10 rules everyone should follow for a lasting and healthy relationship.

  1. Work on Your Relationship

Relationships don?t happen in a bubble. There are times when you will fall into heated arguments, and times when you’ll share your inner secrets with your partner. It takes two to mingle- be ready to work on your relationship. Relationships change and develop, they require constant care and attention. Read this article from London Meditation Centre to understand more about how relationships change.

  1. You Can’t Change Your Partner

Never get into a relationship thinking you will change the other person. The only person that can change for the better is you. You should however table whatever behaviors or things that you think your partner should work on before getting into any commitment.

  1. Control your Anger

As angry as you might be with something, you shouldn?t direct the anger to your partner. It’s by controlling your anger that you can find ways to solve the problem.

  1. Understand Your Differences

Men and women are different.  Don?t be angry about the differences but instead celebrate them. This is the only way your relationship can be exciting, fun, and peaceful.

  1. Recommit to Your Mate

Learn to respect and cherish your mate all the time. Make every morning a chance to reconnect and honor each other in one way or the other.

  1. Don’t Dwell in Anger

Don?t let anger kill an otherwise healthy relationship. If angry or annoyed by something, take some time to calm down, then approach/discuss any differences with him/her. It makes perfect sense to discuss something when both of you are calm, and not when one is over the roof.

  1. Refresh Your Connection

It’s easy for a healthy relationship to become monotonous and boring. Looking for ways to sweeten the relationship either through a relationship counselor, reading a relationship book, or attending a couple’s workshop would be a wise idea.

  1. Build A Friendship Out of The Relationship

As unromantic as it may sound, creating a friendship with your partner will help strengthen the relationship.

  1. You Are Responsible for Your Happiness

Don?t expect your partner to make you happy all the time. It is your responsibility to be satisfied in the relationship.

  1. Do What You Want To be Done To You

Relationships work better if you are reasonable enough, and do to your partner what you’d wish for him/her to do to you.  Be understanding to be understood. If you feel the other partner isn?t doing much, do more for them.

 

The post 10 Rules To A Healthy Relationship appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" } ["summary"]=> string(589) "

Nothing sweeps anyone off their feet that falling in love. The thought of being in love with someone, and being loved back is the best feeling anyone can have.  It’s however easy for people in a relationship to argue or even disagree on certain things. Knowing how to handle various situations is however what keeps […]

The post 10 Rules To A Healthy Relationship appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["atom_content"]=> string(4277) "

Nothing sweeps anyone off their feet that falling in love. The thought of being in love with someone, and being loved back is the best feeling anyone can have.  It’s however easy for people in a relationship to argue or even disagree on certain things. Knowing how to handle various situations is however what keeps the other person going, hence giving your relationship a second chance. Here are 10 rules everyone should follow for a lasting and healthy relationship.

  1. Work on Your Relationship

Relationships don?t happen in a bubble. There are times when you will fall into heated arguments, and times when you’ll share your inner secrets with your partner. It takes two to mingle- be ready to work on your relationship. Relationships change and develop, they require constant care and attention. Read this article from London Meditation Centre to understand more about how relationships change.

  1. You Can’t Change Your Partner

Never get into a relationship thinking you will change the other person. The only person that can change for the better is you. You should however table whatever behaviors or things that you think your partner should work on before getting into any commitment.

  1. Control your Anger

As angry as you might be with something, you shouldn?t direct the anger to your partner. It’s by controlling your anger that you can find ways to solve the problem.

  1. Understand Your Differences

Men and women are different.  Don?t be angry about the differences but instead celebrate them. This is the only way your relationship can be exciting, fun, and peaceful.

  1. Recommit to Your Mate

Learn to respect and cherish your mate all the time. Make every morning a chance to reconnect and honor each other in one way or the other.

  1. Don’t Dwell in Anger

Don?t let anger kill an otherwise healthy relationship. If angry or annoyed by something, take some time to calm down, then approach/discuss any differences with him/her. It makes perfect sense to discuss something when both of you are calm, and not when one is over the roof.

  1. Refresh Your Connection

It’s easy for a healthy relationship to become monotonous and boring. Looking for ways to sweeten the relationship either through a relationship counselor, reading a relationship book, or attending a couple’s workshop would be a wise idea.

  1. Build A Friendship Out of The Relationship

As unromantic as it may sound, creating a friendship with your partner will help strengthen the relationship.

  1. You Are Responsible for Your Happiness

Don?t expect your partner to make you happy all the time. It is your responsibility to be satisfied in the relationship.

  1. Do What You Want To be Done To You

Relationships work better if you are reasonable enough, and do to your partner what you’d wish for him/her to do to you.  Be understanding to be understood. If you feel the other partner isn?t doing much, do more for them.

 

The post 10 Rules To A Healthy Relationship appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["date_timestamp"]=> int(1567786961) } [9]=> array(11) { ["title"]=> string(54) "Christian Online Dating Sites: Which is Right For You?" ["link"]=> string(91) "https://blog.loveawake.com/2019/09/06/christian-online-dating-sites-which-is-right-for-you/" ["pubdate"]=> string(31) "Fri, 06 Sep 2019 16:05:43 +0000" ["dc"]=> array(1) { ["creator"]=> string(9) "Alex Wise" } ["category"]=> string(58) "Dating AdviceCatholicschristianOrthodoProdestantsreligious" ["guid"]=> string(34) "https://blog.loveawake.com/?p=2986" ["description"]=> string(639) "

The internet gives us the ability to connect with like minded people that share our beliefs, faith, and morals. If you are a christian man or woman that is unable to meet someone who shares these beliefs, you might try a site dedicated to matching christian singles. Mainstream Dating Sites and Christian Beliefs The top ?mainstream? […]

The post Christian Online Dating Sites: Which is Right For You? appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

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The internet gives us the ability to connect with like minded people that share our beliefs, faith, and morals. If you are a christian man or woman that is unable to meet someone who shares these beliefs, you might try a site dedicated to matching christian singles.

Mainstream Dating Sites and Christian Beliefs

The top ?mainstream? dating sites like eHarmony or Match, do give users the ability to search for singles based on any type of religion. The largest ?free? dating sites like Plenty Of Fish will give you this ability also.

But, users who list themselves as christian might be casual believers, might not attend church, or just self identify as being christian. ?Religious beliefs? are listed as one of the top criteria that people look for in a compatible mate. Dissimilar beliefs or morals was one of the top reasons that singles felt that they were incompatible.

Connecting with a person who is also dedicated to faith in the same ways that you are, might lead to a more fulfilling and longer lasting relationship. In this case, you may opt to be part of an entire network or christian singles like ChristianMingle or ChistianMatchmaker. This type of site might offer you access to mates that are regular church attendees, have a moral system that is inline with yours, and want to raise children in a similar type of household. If you are searching for true love and serious about marriage and children, these sites would likely be your best bet.

Top Dedicated Christian Dating Sites

100?s of dating sites specifically seek connect based on different aspects of their faith or style of belief. These sites include Christian Mingle and Christian Cafe. One problem with dedicated christian dating sites is that they may have smaller userbases, thus less single people for you to choose from.

The profiles may be out of date or not have an abundance or users in your particular area. If you decide to pay for a monthly membership on a site, you should be sure that they are adequate numbers of members in your local area.

Here are a list of the top dedicated christian sites:

1) Christian Mingle

2) Chistian Matchmaker

3) Christian Cafe

Christian Sites You May Want To Avoid

Christian dating makes up a large subsection of the online dating community. Sites are created specifically to target this particular demographic (which is very profitable for them). Even though these sites serve a similar purpose of connecting like minded Christian single, it can make users feel like a product. The owners of the companies that run these sites may or may not be run by people dedicated to the faith. One site, called BigChurch is run by the company that owns a range of sites in the Friendfinder network. These include adult themed dating sites, that may be incompatible with you belief system. It is also owned by the company with publishes that adult magazine Penthouse. Some christian daters might feel that this conflicts with their moral beliefs and might choose to use dating sites that are run by Christians.

Small Niche Christian Sites

In addition to the large mainstream christian dating sites, there are also smaller sites that may fit a users need more specifially. For example, blackchristianpeoplemeet.com is a site that caters to African American who identify as being christian. There are also dating sites that cater towards the LDS community which would include LDSSingles and LDSMingle. There are also dating sites specifically for Orthodox, Catholics, and Prodestants.

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The internet gives us the ability to connect with like minded people that share our beliefs, faith, and morals. If you are a christian man or woman that is unable to meet someone who shares these beliefs, you might try a site dedicated to matching christian singles. Mainstream Dating Sites and Christian Beliefs The top ?mainstream? […]

The post Christian Online Dating Sites: Which is Right For You? appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

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The internet gives us the ability to connect with like minded people that share our beliefs, faith, and morals. If you are a christian man or woman that is unable to meet someone who shares these beliefs, you might try a site dedicated to matching christian singles.

Mainstream Dating Sites and Christian Beliefs

The top ?mainstream? dating sites like eHarmony or Match, do give users the ability to search for singles based on any type of religion. The largest ?free? dating sites like Plenty Of Fish will give you this ability also.

But, users who list themselves as christian might be casual believers, might not attend church, or just self identify as being christian. ?Religious beliefs? are listed as one of the top criteria that people look for in a compatible mate. Dissimilar beliefs or morals was one of the top reasons that singles felt that they were incompatible.

Connecting with a person who is also dedicated to faith in the same ways that you are, might lead to a more fulfilling and longer lasting relationship. In this case, you may opt to be part of an entire network or christian singles like ChristianMingle or ChistianMatchmaker. This type of site might offer you access to mates that are regular church attendees, have a moral system that is inline with yours, and want to raise children in a similar type of household. If you are searching for true love and serious about marriage and children, these sites would likely be your best bet.

Top Dedicated Christian Dating Sites

100?s of dating sites specifically seek connect based on different aspects of their faith or style of belief. These sites include Christian Mingle and Christian Cafe. One problem with dedicated christian dating sites is that they may have smaller userbases, thus less single people for you to choose from.

The profiles may be out of date or not have an abundance or users in your particular area. If you decide to pay for a monthly membership on a site, you should be sure that they are adequate numbers of members in your local area.

Here are a list of the top dedicated christian sites:

1) Christian Mingle

2) Chistian Matchmaker

3) Christian Cafe

Christian Sites You May Want To Avoid

Christian dating makes up a large subsection of the online dating community. Sites are created specifically to target this particular demographic (which is very profitable for them). Even though these sites serve a similar purpose of connecting like minded Christian single, it can make users feel like a product. The owners of the companies that run these sites may or may not be run by people dedicated to the faith. One site, called BigChurch is run by the company that owns a range of sites in the Friendfinder network. These include adult themed dating sites, that may be incompatible with you belief system. It is also owned by the company with publishes that adult magazine Penthouse. Some christian daters might feel that this conflicts with their moral beliefs and might choose to use dating sites that are run by Christians.

Small Niche Christian Sites

In addition to the large mainstream christian dating sites, there are also smaller sites that may fit a users need more specifially. For example, blackchristianpeoplemeet.com is a site that caters to African American who identify as being christian. There are also dating sites that cater towards the LDS community which would include LDSSingles and LDSMingle. There are also dating sites specifically for Orthodox, Catholics, and Prodestants.

The post Christian Online Dating Sites: Which is Right For You? appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

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