The Unofficial Guide to the Disney Cruise Line

The Disney-themed theater shows usually come in two types: Re-tellings of familiar stories, and “jukebox” musicals. Disney’s Aladdin, on the Fantasy, is an example of the re-telling genre. The cruise version features live actors and multiple Arabian-themed sets reprising key scenes from Disney’s animated film, including the most popular songs, in about half the time of the original movie. The Magic’s Twice Charmed, a twist on the original Cinderella story, is probably the best theater show in this category; the Fantasy’s Aladdin is a distant second, and the Wonder’s version of Toy Story is third.

Examples of “jukebox” musicals include Dreams, Wishes, Believe, and The Golden Mickeys. Each of these shows feature songs and characters from many different Disney films, with each number linked together by a new, original story. We’re generally not fans of these shows. The storylines are trivial and their main job, apparently, is to get to the next musical number rather than provide interesting narrative. Lack of a plot, however, isn’t our primary objection to these shows – we realize it’s a Disney cruise. Rather, the big problem is that these shows recycle the same handful of characters and songs played in every entertainment venue throughout the ship. If you haven’t heard Be Our Guest from Beauty and the Beast performed a dozen times on board, have your hearing checked when you get back home.

Dining:

On the Dream's Remy:

What makes a great restaurant, such as Remy, different from restaurants that are simply very good, is that while very good restaurants usually have a few “signature” dishes which they do very well, virtually everything at Remy is exceptional. An appetizer of carrots – yes, the root vegetable - will be most delicious set of carrots you’ve ever had, probably in varieties and colors you didn’t know existed, and with a taste that is the pure essence of carrot-ness. Now imagine a meal of 3 to 8 courses, all equally as good, ranging from soups, seafood, and beef, to side dishes, cheese courses, and desserts. That’s a quotidian evening at Remy.

On the Wonder's Parrot Cay food:

Disney tries to “Caribbean-ize” its standard menu items by adding jerk seasoning, plantains, and tropical fruits as garnishes, but it’s essentially the same food you’ll get throughout the ship. Need to turn an Italian mozzarella and tomato plate into an island-theme appetizer? Add a bit of grilled gourd and it becomes the “St. Marteen Stack!” You’ll be much happier if you can swing reservations at Palo on the night you’re supposed to eat at Parrot Cay. If that doesn’t work, try the Cove Café’s antipasto sampler or room service.