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The epitome of grace, independence, and wit, Lauren Bacall continues to project an audacious spirit and pursue on-screen excellence. The product of an extraordinary mother and a loving extended family, she produced, with Humphrey Bogart, some of the most electric and memorable scenes in movie history. After tragically losing Bogart, she returned to New York and a brilliant career in the theatre. A two-time Tony winner, she married and later divorced her second love, Jason Robards, and never lost sight of the strength that made her a star.
Now, thirty years after the publication of her original National Book Award–winning memoir, Bacall has added new material to her inspiring history. In her own frank and beautiful words, one of our most enduring actresses reveals the remarkable true story of a lifetime so rich with incident and achievement that Hollywood itself would be unable to adequately reproduce it.
All I had known of films was Bette Davis and Leslie Howard. (I was in love with him -- alas, was never to meet him.) She was my fifteen-year-old idea of perfection -- fine actress, dramatic bravery, doomed tragedy, sardonic wit -- all an actress should be, and when I cut school I would sit all day in a movie house sobbing through Dark Victory or Jezebel or The Old Maid, smoking in the balcony (I paid for a whole package, so I had to finish it). Forbidden at home, of course -- getting sick on tobacco, and Sen-Sen to get the stench out of my mouth so as to go undetected by Mother and Uncle Charlie. One morning my uncle came in to kiss me goodbye before leaving for work and said, 'Have you been smoking?' Shaking, I replied, 'Of course not.' Whereupon he went into the next room to tell my mother he was certain I was smoking -- whereupon they both faced me, trembling in my bed. 'We know you have been, we can smell it on your breath.' What had happened to Sen-Sen? -- it had failed me for the first time. In a flood of tears I confessed -- I had, but I would never do it again! 'Please forgive me -- I promise.' Mother: 'You'd better not, a girl your age -- disgusting -- what kind of a girl do you want to become -- nice girls of fifteen don't smoke!' Oh God -- would I survive this humiliation!
Tail between the legs for days afterward -- Charlie and Mother sniffing daily, trying to detect the evil weed. My first confrontation with the Sam Spade syndrome. Wouldn't I ever grow up -- be on my own, free to do what I wished? Wouldn't I ever live alone? The purity of Jewish upbringing -- the restrictions that one carries through life being a 'nice Jewish girl' -- what a burden. But if you were -- and I was -- you had it drummed into your head from childhood by your mother, grandmother, uncles, that nice Jewish girls didn't smoke -- weren't fast -- nice Jewish girls had character. 'Don't chase a boy, ever -- if he wants to see you, he'll call; if not, forget him.' But what were you to do if your head was filled with dreams of beauty, glamour, romance, accomplishment, and if you were stuck with being tall, ungainly (I didn't know I was 'colt-like' until a critic said I was), with big feet, flat chested -- too young to have finished high school at fifteen, too inexperienced, shy, frightened to know what to do with a boy when I did have a date? If my dream would only come true, then I would know how to behave, then things would fall into place -- wouldn't they?
I wouldn't always be a wallflower. Already there was one boy who had a fantastic crush on me. I went out with him because there was no one else, and I tried to make him part of my romantic dream. He'd kiss me goodnight. He was sweet to me, he was boring, but he did call -- I'd better be nice to him. It was soon Christmas, then New Year's, and I didn't want to be alone New Year's Eve -- not when my friends had dates -- so I went to a party with him on New Year's Eve -- just sixteen, sweet sixteen -- and we danced to 'Deep Purple' while I pretended he was Leslie Howard. Pretending started early. What a fantasy world -- so much better than the real one. We sat on a sofa in the darkened room, he had his arm around me -- he kissed me, I guess -- all the kids were doing the same thing -- 'Happy New Year!' Why wasn't he Leslie Howard just for that moment I looked at him? It wasn't good enough, I thought, to have someone crazy about you if you felt nothing. No -- it would not do. I couldn't stand him, couldn't bear to let him touch me. I should have known right then that it would always be the same -- I had to be madly in love or utterly revolted. No happy mediums for me! So I started that year -- 1941 -- deciding not to see him again. I always made out a list of New Year's resolutions and that was one of them. I didn't keep the others, but I did keep that one. No compromises in life for me -- I wouldn't settle -- I'd rather not go out, just live with my dreams.
Each time I was in love -- this was it. The hunger to belong. Imagination is the highest kite that can fly. When you have nothing but dreams, that's all you think about, all that matters, all that takes you away from humdrummery -- the fact that your mother was working too hard and didn't have enough in her own life, that your grandmother, loving though she was, wanted you to get a decent job to help your mother, that you didn't have enough money to do anything you wanted to do, even buy a lousy coat for $17.95. Dreams were better -- that was where my hope lay -- I'd hang on to them, never let go. They were my own.
It wasn't that I was deprived -- we just had to live on a strict budget. No, it was that everything I fantasized about had nothing to do with everything I lived. Not a thing! Yet Mother gave me everything -- everything she could -- more. She was a decent, proud, honorable woman who despite her struggles never lost her sense of humor. She just wanted me to be perfect. She wanted me to have it all, but to know and to learn while the search was on; to realize that there were other things not to lose sight of. She wasn't proud of having to count the pennies -- not resentful -- just very private about that and everything else to do with family ...
By Myself and Then Some. Copyright © by Lauren Bacall. Reprinted by permission of HarperCollins Publishers, Inc. All rights reserved. Available now wherever books are sold.Anonymous
Posted Wed Aug 01 00:00:00 EDT 2012
Not your typical celebrity bio. Like its author, this book is elegant, wise and spirited. Bogart, Huston, Slim Hayward, Hawks, Robards, Streisand, Bernstein, RFK - they are all here. My favorite character: the author's wonderful mother.
7 out of 8 people found this review helpful.
Was this review helpful? Yes NoThank you for your feedback. Report this reviewThank you, this review has been flagged.This book is a wonderful read for anyone who is a fan of old "Tinsel Town". Reading this book feels as though you were sitting having coffe with the incredible Bacall herself. It offers insight into her life, as a starting actress, when she meets her great love, Bogart, and her life after his death. It keeps you going as it casually mentions many of the Hollywood Greats; Bogart, Monroe, Sinatra, Leigh, Gable, and so many more. It is a book that makes you travel back to a simpler life, and leaves you feeling as though you have had a peak into Bacalls own personal Diary. Bacalls allows you to laugh with her, and cry with her as she recalls her most personal moments.
7 out of 8 people found this review helpful.
Was this review helpful? Yes NoThank you for your feedback. Report this reviewThank you, this review has been flagged.Anonymous
Posted Tue Apr 12 00:00:00 EDT 2005
Please don't get me wrong about this book BUT my wife and I both read it and essentially had the same opinion. The first half of the book, up until Bogart's death, is GREAT. It's fast paced, reveals interesting facts and insights, and is immensely enjoyable. But after his death the book becomes a never ending, over done discussion of all her friends dying. It becomes tedious and depressing reading that meanders all over the place. Read the first half of the book and then stop. I bet you'll find it more enjoyable than finishing it, strange but true.
4 out of 4 people found this review helpful.
Was this review helpful? Yes NoThank you for your feedback. Report this reviewThank you, this review has been flagged.Anonymous
Posted Thu Jan 05 00:00:00 EST 2012
I've just finished the sample of this book, and although she is clearly not gifted as a writer, you definitely get the sense that you are reading Ms. Bacall's very own thoughts, and not the idealized spin of a ghost writer. Her remembrances are rambling and not well structured as she meanders through the details of her upbringing. Some may enjoy this style of writing; I did not. However I did come away from this sample liking Ms. Bacall more than I did previously, and I would like to know more about her. Bacall fans will probably love this book for the reasons I mention previously.
3 out of 5 people found this review helpful.
Was this review helpful? Yes NoThank you for your feedback. Report this reviewThank you, this review has been flagged.CD: the first three disks are about her life getting into the business and her life with Bogart. The parts about cancer treatments in the 50's were interesting. She was very naive.
She wrote this when she was in her late forties and divorcing Jason Robards.
Then Lauren lived another 25 years and wrote the second part. The next three disks were done after 2003. Even her voice has changed. She goes through the deaths of her good friends, some you know, some you won't. Rodney McDowell, Sir John Gilgood (who was gay),Gregory Peck, Sir Alec Guinness (Obi One Kenobi) and others. The rest is her complaining about missing the good old day.
She is still alive. I didn't realize that and decided not to look till I was done listening to it.
3 out of 5 people found this review helpful.
Was this review helpful? Yes NoThank you for your feedback. Report this reviewThank you, this review has been flagged.Anonymous
Posted Thu Mar 03 00:00:00 EST 2005
This updated version of 'By Myself' is exactly what we Bacall fans were hoping and waiting for. Incorporating many of the anecdotes from '94's 'Now', this is the complete and up-to-date story of the lady's life, loves and career so far. Her regal presence and enduring strength and independence sing through on every page. It would be impossible to walk away unimpressed with the resilience and tough/sweet nature of our Grande Dame. There'll never be another Betty Bacall so this frank and earnest telling of her life is a completely unique read.
3 out of 4 people found this review helpful.
Was this review helpful? Yes NoThank you for your feedback. Report this reviewThank you, this review has been flagged.I was pleasantly surprised when I began reading this book. It's as if Lauren was my best friend and was reminiscing about her past with me over coffee. I laughed with her and I cried with her. The pictures inside the book give you a window into her world. She has definitely lived a long and happy life and I hope she has many more years to come.
2 out of 2 people found this review helpful.
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Posted Sun Apr 06 00:00:00 EDT 2008
I felt as though Miss Bacall seemed very immature, especially before she married Boggie and after she had children. It seemed to me, the children were raised by 'Nannys' while she had endless parties or traveled. In fairness, I suppose, that was what most actors did and still seem to do.
2 out of 6 people found this review helpful.
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Posted Sat Aug 16 00:00:00 EDT 2014
It is very sad indeed how hard she tries to make her story a silver screen movie old style happy ever after. That she married a much older divorced man and had him dying hospice at home leaves her with most of her life fifty years dependent on his fame for hers. She seems to have little joy in her life after hollywood neither with son or grandchildren and it reflects in the writing as such disappointng and uncomfortable to read like a group therapy session
1 out of 2 people found this review helpful.
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Posted Fri Aug 15 00:00:00 EDT 2014
Lauren Bacall was quite a treasure! This is an excellent book about her wonderful family and career...
1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.
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Posted Mon Mar 03 00:00:00 EST 2014
Why someone with stage fright could keep in the profession and why keep marrying alcoholics and such good friends with everyone and family disfunctional and seeing nothing wrong with leaving for months but so general as to be non descriptive. There is no humor ad great and good friends come across as dull too
1 out of 4 people found this review helpful.
Was this review helpful? Yes NoThank you for your feedback. Report this reviewThank you, this review has been flagged.I love Lauren Bacall as an actress and a person. She has such life in her and it shows beautifully on screen and in this book. This book had me laughing and crying. Truly unforgettable.
1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.
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Posted Mon Sep 08 00:00:00 EDT 2014
I am not much of a writer or describe things well however, I can tell you this book is very enjoyable. Miss Bacall is very open about her life, family and relationships. There were a few things I thought she was vague about and that is her children's lives but, that could be because she wanted to keep the kids and grand kids private? Anyway, if you enjoy autobiographies about celebrities this is a real treat!
Jane
Anonymous
Posted Thu Jan 31 00:00:00 EST 2013
All u wanted to know!
0 out of 2 people found this review helpful.
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Overview
The epitome of grace, independence, and wit, Lauren Bacall continues to project an audacious spirit and pursue on-screen excellence. The product of an extraordinary mother and a loving extended family, she produced, with Humphrey Bogart, some of the most electric and memorable scenes in movie history. After tragically losing Bogart, she returned to New York and a brilliant career in the theatre. A two-time Tony winner, she married and later divorced her second love, Jason ...