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Storyline
Silly sex romp disguised as a action/espionage film. Two beautiful American special agents are given a head start by an oriental crime boss. The head start is to get away from the teams of assassins he has lined up to kill them. Numerous visual costume changes later, the busty duo team up with other agents to make a convenient team of eight, all paired off in a boy/girl, boy/girl manner. It's a wonder that they aren't all killed as very little watching gets done while each couple take guard duty. Written by
Rob Hartill
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Taglines:
It's a new kind of game ... The Rules will kill you!
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Quotes
'Kane' Kaneshiro:
Let the games begin!
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Connections
Followed by
Day of the Warrior (1996)
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Soundtracks
Down on the Bayou
Words & Music by
Richard Lyons
Sung by
Cynthia Brimhall See more »
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Recent Posts
... so I will. In this one, our intrepid Playmates, I mean Federal Agents (?!), Dona and Roberta are targeted for elimination by an army of fairly unimaginative and not very skilled hit men. No points for guessing who comes out on top. Speaking of tops, Dona and Roberta lose theirs fairly often, which is clearly the point of the exercise.
Andy Sidaris has no better directorial sense than Ed Wood, and not much more money, but like Ed Wood, he never let a shortage of cash or talent keep him out of the director's chair. Not only do his movies play like low rent T&A version of Chips or some other bad 70s TV action show, this one comes complete with Erik Estrada! Another 70s TV reliquary, the normally charming Pat Morita, is also here as a generic Asian crime boss, but he has little screen time in which to embarrass himself. Actually this movie is much worse than generic action TV, with laughably worse (although not actually funnier) acting and dialogue, uninspired action sequence construction and painfully cheap explosion effects. I doubt they blew up anything worth more than about ten bucks in the whole movie. You can practically read 'Fisher Price' on the models used for effects shots.
The artwork on the DVD box looks better than any of the pyrotechnics used in the picture. And the plot-line itself seems like a random assemblage of action bits created by means of a dartboard, which it probably was. Nevertheless, Andy Boy knows what his audience wants: bouncy Playmates showing off a lot of skin while shooting it out with bad guys, and he delivers the goods. You have to give the guy credit for truth in advertising if nothing else.