Truyen cuoi (fwd)

[Nhat Quang Ton <nqt@minyos.its.rmit.EDU.AU>]

Forwarded message:
>From nqt  Thu Apr 24 11:16:02 1997
From: Nhat Quang Ton <nqt>
Message-Id: <199704240116.LAA28295@minyos.its.rmit.EDU.AU>
Subject: Truyen cuoi
To: nqt (Nhat Quang Ton)
Date: Thu, 24 Apr 1997 11:16:00 +1000 (EST)
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                        Marriage Humor

              Many a man owes his success to his first wife and his second
wife to his
              success. - Jim Backus

              I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry.
That must be
              why my wife treats me like toxic waste. - David Bissonette

              I've sometimes thought of marrying, and then I've thought
again. - Noel
              Coward, 1956

              A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is
finished. - Zsa
              Zsa Gabor

              I'm an excellent housekeeper. Every time I get a divorce, I
keep the
              house. - Zsa Zsa Gabor

              When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than
to let him
              keep her. - Sacha Guitry

              Marriage is like pi - natural, irrational, and very
important. - Lisa Hoffman

              She's a lovely person. She deserves a good husband. Marry
her before
              she finds one. - Oscar Levant to Harpo Marx upon meeting
Harpo's
              fiancee

              Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest
cheat in Europe-
              Jackie Mason

              Marriage is like a cage; one sees the birds outside
desperate to get in, and
              those inside desperate to get out. - Montaigne

              After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin;
they just
              can't face each other, but still they stay together. --
Hemant Joshi

              By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy.
If you get a
              bad one, you'll become a philosopher...and that is a good
thing for any
              man. - Socrates

              A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife
can spend.
              A successful woman is one who can find such a man. - Lana
Turner

              Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an
institution.- Mae
              West

       [the authors of the following are not known]

              Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding
ring,
              and suffering.

              Marriage is bliss. Ignorance is bliss. Therefore ...

              Marriage is not a word; it is a sentence.

              Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
Second
              marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.

              Marriage is when a man and woman become as one; the trouble
              starts when they try to decide which one.

              Marriages are made in heaven. But so again, are thunder and
              lightning.

              Before marriage, a man yearns for the woman he loves. After
              marriage, the 'Y' becomes silent.

              Do not marry a person that you know that you can live with;
only
              marry someone that you cannot live without.

              I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs
              with me.

              If you want your spouse to listen and pay strict attention
to every
              word you say, talk in your sleep.