At a Catholic high school, the popular girl teams up with a sophomore newspaper reporter to investigate a case of stolen SAT exams. Once the duo target their suspects, a larger conspiracy is unearthed.
A comedy about a veteran NYPD cop whose rare baseball card is stolen. Since it's his only hope to pay for his daughter's upcoming wedding, he recruits his partner to track down the thief, a memorabilia-obsessed gangster.
Director:
Kevin Smith
Stars:
Bruce Willis,
Tracy Morgan,
Juan Carlos Hernández
Set in a futuristic world where humans live in isolation and interact through surrogate robots, a cop is forced to leave his home for the first time in years in order to investigate the murders of others' surrogates.
Jimmy the Tulip's (Willis) quiet new life is shaken up by his old pal Oz (Perry), whose wife (Henstridge) has been kidnapped by a Hungarian mob. The Tulip and his wife Jill (Peet) spring into action.
Director:
Howard Deutch
Stars:
Bruce Willis,
Matthew Perry,
Natasha Henstridge
A NASA astronaut (Thornton), forced to retire years earlier so he could save his family farm, has never given up his dream of space travel and looks to build his own rocket, despite the government's threats to stop him.
Director:
Michael Polish
Stars:
Billy Bob Thornton,
Virginia Madsen,
Bruce Dern
An aging alcoholic cop is assigned the task of escorting a witness from police custody to a courthouse 16 blocks away. There are, however, chaotic forces at work that prevent them from making it in one piece.
For Tes (Akerman) and her two cohorts Kara (Nikki Reed) and Dawn (Deborah Ann Woll), the job sounded simple enough: intercept a double-cross drug shipment for their crime boss Mel (Willis) ... See full summary »
Director:
Aaron Harvey
Stars:
Malin Akerman,
Nikki Reed,
Deborah Ann Woll
A hopeless slacker, portrayed by the character's real-life namesake, finds his ambition awakened by a gorgeous waitress who is hiding from her past. Strong emotions compel Ben to find the ... See full summary »
Nick is a struggling dentist in Canada. A new neighbor moves in, and he discovers that it is Jimmy "The Tulip" Teduski. His wife convinces him to go to Chicago and inform the mob boss who wants Jimmy dead.
Director:
Jonathan Lynn
Stars:
Bruce Willis,
Matthew Perry,
Rosanna Arquette
High School. Four of the most important years of your life. But it isn't always dances and keg parties and sucking face in your parents' mini-van. Sometimes it's ugly and hard and complicated. As complicated as a conspiracy to overthrow the president. There's something rotten at St. Donovan's High and sophomore newspaper reporter Bobby Funke is on it like pink rubber bands on your little sister's braces. When senior hottie Francesca Facchini solicits Funke's help tracking down a set of stolen SATs, Funke uncovers a story dirtier than the lunch lady's mustache. After he fingers the school president (figuratively) for the crime, Funke becomes one of the most popular kids at St. Donovan's High. No longer known simply as the freshman who was once tied to a giant snowman penis, Funke wins the respect of everyone from the Desert-Storm-hero-turned-educator Principal Kirkpatrick to the kid that farts on him in Spanish class. When Francesca takes Funke to homecoming, even the in-school ... Written by
Yari Film Group
Although the location is never clearly stated, Principal Kirkpatrick, played by Bruce Willis, has the state flag of New Jersey in his office. Willis grew up in Penns Grove New Jersey. See more »
Goofs
The Spanish teacher mispronounces the word "página." See more »
Quotes
[first lines]
Bobby Funke:
[narrating]
You want to know the truth about high school? You've got to break it down into its elements. Unfortunately, at St. Donovan's, the periodic table is more crooked than a case of scoliosis. Just give me the chance and I'll set it all straight. Case in point, Spanish homework. "Dame un batido de esperma" does not mean, "Take me to the airport." It means, "Give me a sperm milkshake." And 22 kids gave that as an answer in Spanish 3 last week. I'm not sure about the milkshake, ...
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ASSASSINATION OF A HIGH SCHOOL PRESIDENT is a big step above most of the teen movies that focus on potty mouth dialogue and absurd situations just to get laughs. Writers Tim Calpin and Kevin Jakubowski have come up with a script that is sometimes smart but ultimately full of holes in deciding where it wants to take the original premise of this high school movie. Director Brett Simon seems to sort of let the movie flow as it develops, preventing a tight telling of a story with potential.
Bobby Funke (Reece Thompson, a promising new talent) is a nerdy newspaper reporter who is never able to finish a story. Student Body President/basketball star/ladies' man Paul Moore (Patrick Taylor) seems to have everything Bobby wants, including the attention of the school's most beautiful girl Francesca (Mischa Barton). As fortune would have it a crime happens - the SATs are stolen from the office of Principal Kirkpatrick (Bruce Willis playing Bruce Willis) and Booby is on the investigation and story, a story that points to Paul as the perpetrator. Bobby's nerdiness is transformed by his attention and by the affections of Francesca, and soon the school collapses under the cloud of the crime. It is how the 'crime' is inspected and resolved that ends the film. For Bobby Funke it is a matter of 'What price glory'.
The cast is fresh and it is a pleasure to see some new faces with promise. Whether it is the director's or the sound mixer's fault, much of the dialogue is swallowed by the soundtrack, a problem thankfully solved by turning on the subtitles. This is a movie with promise from all involved and it will be interesting to see if it has an impact on teen flick quality.
Grady Harp
7 of 8 people found this review helpful.
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ASSASSINATION OF A HIGH SCHOOL PRESIDENT is a big step above most of the teen movies that focus on potty mouth dialogue and absurd situations just to get laughs. Writers Tim Calpin and Kevin Jakubowski have come up with a script that is sometimes smart but ultimately full of holes in deciding where it wants to take the original premise of this high school movie. Director Brett Simon seems to sort of let the movie flow as it develops, preventing a tight telling of a story with potential.
Bobby Funke (Reece Thompson, a promising new talent) is a nerdy newspaper reporter who is never able to finish a story. Student Body President/basketball star/ladies' man Paul Moore (Patrick Taylor) seems to have everything Bobby wants, including the attention of the school's most beautiful girl Francesca (Mischa Barton). As fortune would have it a crime happens - the SATs are stolen from the office of Principal Kirkpatrick (Bruce Willis playing Bruce Willis) and Booby is on the investigation and story, a story that points to Paul as the perpetrator. Bobby's nerdiness is transformed by his attention and by the affections of Francesca, and soon the school collapses under the cloud of the crime. It is how the 'crime' is inspected and resolved that ends the film. For Bobby Funke it is a matter of 'What price glory'.
The cast is fresh and it is a pleasure to see some new faces with promise. Whether it is the director's or the sound mixer's fault, much of the dialogue is swallowed by the soundtrack, a problem thankfully solved by turning on the subtitles. This is a movie with promise from all involved and it will be interesting to see if it has an impact on teen flick quality.
Grady Harp